Serena Shahidi
Jan 18, 2022 BY
@serena-shahidiš¬
I picked up this book from a used bookstore in midtown after seeing the cover, which read ādead glamorous: the autobiography of seduction and self-destructionā - enough to convince me! The book, aptly named, is about death and glamour, which are just about all I think about nowadays. Carole is shallow and cynical and twisted and perfect and relatable (ex. āI wanted to live in a black-and-white world with champagne for breakfast and millions of men committing suicide over meā) - jāadore!
Jan 18, 2022
š
I recently got very into the Advanced Style Aesthetic and wanted more than anything to embody the style of an eccentric old woman. Through extensive personal research I have discovered that you can get loads of gaudy old-lady costume jewelry for cheap by searching ācostume jewelry lotā on eBay, and youāll find the best stuff if you add āgrandmotherāsā or āestateā as well. As Iām writing this, I have on two chunky beaded necklaces, a pair of fake gold statement earrings, and a cameo ring. I feel like the most fabulous girl on a cruise ship!
Jan 18, 2022
š
HAND TO GOD, this is my holy grail stuck-on-a-desert-island-with-a-hottie-iām-trying-to-seduce beauty product, and itās like five dollars! Itās a long wearing lip stain - and LISTEN to me, because I know every product has that claim nowadays!!! I will not allege that one application lasts me a full day, but Iām sure it would on someone who eats and drinks and touches their mouth and kisses strangers a lot less. WHO WANTS TO LIVE LIKE THAT! What I will say about its staying power is that it fades away gorgeously - it wonāt crumble off like a chalky liquid formula or rub off on a loverās collar like a traditional lipstick. Apply this stain, let it set for a minute, add a lipstick/balm/liner/gloss on top if youād like, and go out and liveee! Youāll probably only have to reapply once or twice the whole day. Perfect for girls like me who always want to be Spotted in a red lip but arenāt responsible enough to keep up with one all the time. The two shades I use the most are called āsocialiteā and āfemme fatale,ā appropriate as those are what I also state as my job title to first dates!
Jan 18, 2022
š
Like all other gen z-ers (brag), I simply must have something to listen to while I go about doing my ordinary daily tasks. Podcasts are fun but sometimes I need a break from hearing stories narrated by LA millennials and I want them right from the SOURCE (or at least a robot narrating a story that was written by the SOURCE). Enter Reddit narration videosā¦ There are so many youtube videos dedicated to reading reddit stories out loud, but the ones about relationships are my favorite flavor. Thereās something about hearing about infidelity and estranged inlaws that just makes me feel so alive!! A channel called RedditOutLoudRelationships has hundreds of these stories that are fabulous to listen to while you do dishes and steam your dresses and probably develop an innate inability to trust romantic partners because youāre listening to these stories all the time. But itās worth it because theyāre so juicy and now I know exactly what to do if a friend calls me up to tell me they found out their wife has been cheating on them!
Jan 18, 2022
š
A girl like me simply does not wear pants. I have tried and tried and tried but thereās just something about my legs being covered that makes me feel uncomfortable! Wearing miniskirts all year long is a STATEMENT and very 60s and will improve your love life because guys will always come up to you wherever you are and be like āarenāt you cold?ā which is the most sexual question of all time. This has been the first thing said to me by many soon-to-be suitors. After years of not wearing pants, my legs are hardly capable of feeling the cold anymore, but there are a few ways to make it more comfortable. A pair of knee-length boots are essential for the winter - get yourself a good pair of black leather ones (like Vagabond)Ā you can wear pretty much every day, and a costumey white gogo boot if you want to have some extra fun. Tights help, too: whichever black pair you last picked up for $7 at the drugstore, a fleece-lined pair for especially cold days, and a couple different brightly colored pairs for days when youāre feeling like Twiggy. Keep some white thigh-high socks around too - I buy mine from Amazon and they never fall down on me! Enjoy your leg-flaunting and all of your new loversā¦
Jan 18, 2022
šæ
Forget everything youāve heard about Tubi. I need you to be open minded right now - trust me! Pretend Iām holding your hand delicately across a table and looking into your eyes with a silent plea or something like that. Is Tubi a good streaming platform? Well, an argument could surely be made that it is not. Does it have frequent ads? It sure does (itās free). Is it the ideal streaming experience? It is not, but, dear reader (Iāve always wanted to say that but Iāve never had a dear reader for it!) it is the best LIFE experience. There is a world of possibilities on Tubi. There are SEVERAL horror movies surrounding leprechauns. There is a sci-fi collection called Bimbo Movie Bash. There is a comedy special called A Conservative Unleashed. Other movies include Christmas Twister, Horrors of Spider Island, Auntie Leeās Meat Pies, and I Married a Centerfold. I KNOW!!! Run, donāt walk! Explore the dark twisted bowels of Tubi! Maybe take an edible first if thatās your sort of thing.
Jan 18, 2022