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Alissa is my favorite writer. Whether it’s her cult favorite Dead is Better zines (on every bookshelf with integrity) or her seminal piece I’m a Clubber, Alissa has long been heightening the lows of pop culture history so that we don’t have to. She’s also my best friend and together we host The C Word, a podcast about women who have been called crazy for which she does a, well, crazy amount of research. It’s also crazy that I regularly get to sit in bed with my favorite writer while she does her lengthy skin care routine and we watch the best moments of Dateline and scream at the ceiling. I hope we die together in a piece of real estate worthy of us.
Jan 3, 2023
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I don’t personally know Alissa Bennett, but I think she is a brilliant and funny person who has clearly lived a vibrant life. A friend of mine once said about himself, “I’m not a journalist; I just live this shit.” I think this mantra (with the tweak, “I’m just really interested in this shit”) applies to Bennett’s writing and various projects — from her burner IG @regret_counter and podcast, to the next-level zines she publishes. Those zines though, wow! The writing is so intimate, confident, and, well, perfectly imperfect (sorry, sorry…).I like that every other paragraph has a typo, that she will frequently and flagrantly use cap-locks, and that she essentially unpacks the indiscretions of fringe tabloid figures in order to exhume her own demons and make sense of her past and present. It’s got a very “warts and all” vibe, and I respect that she’s willing to air her own dirty laundry in service of establishing a spiritual connection to the subjects of her texts. That’s not to say she goes easy on them, but it all feels empathetic instead of exploitative or solipsistic. Rarely do I audibly laugh while reading, but Bennett’s work consistently makes me LOL. Generally, I prefer when people write the way they talk. Her essays feel like the coolest girl at the bar is whispering (and occasionally shouting) a very good story directly in your ear, but she also doesn’t really care whether you like the story or not. She already knows it’s good.Start with “Bad Behavior,” which is a series of essays/love letters to various semi-public figures who engaged in specific, scandalous acts. Then hit “Pretend You’re Actually Alive.” Most of the zines are sold out, but I’m sure she’d send you a PDF if you ask nicely. There’s also a new one on the way.
Sep 8, 2022
My beloved friend and creative partner of many years and the best writer I know… her first post Trauma Queens is a look at emotional exhibitionism and oversharing online. I highly recommend reading it and following her to see what she comes out with next!!
Apr 27, 2024
Variety TV critic that I've been following for years. Great writer. I interviewed her for this week's newsletter. We talked about cord cutting and the time she interviewed John Mulaney :)))
Jun 13, 2024
Top Recs from @lena-dunham
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I met Russell Brown, the man behind LA acupuncture sensation Poke, at a party in WeHo in 2012. I thought we were flirting but I think he was just sizing up my myriad issues and how they could be addressed by Chinese medicine. He’s since become the kind of friend who is closer to family than actual family, the kind you can call in the night screaming “my pee doesn’t feel right.” His knowledge, calm and ability to discuss Real Housewives’ behavior using terms like Yang and Chi (while still respecting the concepts) makes him indispensable. If you can’t get to LA to see him, where he often works with clients in communities in need, then follow him on Instagram- and subscribe to his free Substack Diet Poke, where he does a great job of simplifying essential concepts in a funny, pop way that’s still totally healing. I particularly love how he grapples with the LA desire to be perfect and the ways in which certain new age goals are at odds with real healing. To put it simply, he’s my Dr. Phil and my Ma Anand Sheela all rolled into one, only queer and without delusions of grandeur. He gets my vote for most likely to change the world.
Jan 3, 2023
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I have (and have had) many pets since I was a wee girl- newts, bunnies, terriers, gerbils, frogs, iguanas, fish, hedgehogs, and I’ve loved each of them with all I’ve got. But over the last few years, I’ve found my truest passion is raising kittens (don’t tell my dogs, who seem 100% sure the cats are just disruptive indignities I must suffer to get back to them.) Kittens are nature’s anti-depressant, the best reality show you’re not watching and a totally inspiring example of the mindfuck that is evolution. I mean, these little creeps have been designed by a Higher Power to look adorably lost, impossibly needy… and then BAM they’re opening all your doors and eating all your salad and looking down at you from the bookshelf like you’re the help in a Downton Abbey sequel. Plus, on a soppy note, a teensy rescue kitten is the example of tenacity we all need- they don’t give up as they go from fetal bird confusion to diabolical emperor. Any opportunity to foster, raise and/or unleash kittens on their next willing fin-dom arrangement is one of my higher callings. At the moment, two young ‘ens are staring at me from a cactus shaped condo in the corner of our bedroom. Another eight year old adoptee/Garfield doppelganger is on a reduced calorie diet upstairs so that he can maintain his heart health and travel in something smaller than the laundry hamper. Look at us! We’re a chic literary salon but I’m the only one who can read (I think. I have one cat who can probably read, she just does it at night when I’m not looking.)
Jan 3, 2023
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Recently a woman at a party came up to me and said : “I used to follow your Instagram but I stopped when your interior problems became a bit much for me.” I guess she meant my health issues, but from now on they’re just “interior problems.” Over the years, as I’ve gotten more used to living in this body (I have endometriosis, auto-immune arthritis and Ehler-Danlos Syndrome) and have learned more about sick girl/crip culture, I’ve grown simultaneously less noisy about my own struggles (there are a lot of people out there doing it better) and more confident about asking for what I need when I need it. One subtle form of support is the cane: it both allows me to hoof around comfortably when I’m in pain and reminds people that we aren’t all walking around with ease and to handle each other with care. You’ve gotta be pretty heartless to body slam someone on a cane just to get to the simple syrup at Blue Bottle coffee, ya know? The cane has the potential, with a little *lol* legwork, be quite stylish- my most cherished is a woman’s walking stick from the early 20th century with a carved parrot’s head handle, its eyes made from gleaming amber glass- this (and many other wonderful walking stickszzzzz) can be procured at: antiquecanes.com, the kind of business that would fail anywhere else but here in London, it’s thriving. The other favorite source for canes is zitomer.com, the eternally fancy pharmacy on the Upper East Side. These are some Liza Minelli, give em the ole razzle dazzle canes. Plus, you can pick up fancy bows and nice mini hand lotions at the same time.
Jan 3, 2023