going celibate until I release my album (slated for July) — maybe Orgy release show? 🤔
ok, so, I am currently on day 107 no boinking — this includes solo boink. this is the longest I have gone since the dawn of my extensive sensual history.
what I intended was to focus my creative horny energy into my music and other ventures— and it has been all that and more.
the clarity through which I am engaging in my environment is unparalleled. no longer marred by my desire to squirt, I am venturing into the unknown corners of my cobwebbed mind and doing a spring cleaning.
I got a life changing job opportunity. album almost done. music video filmed. single submitted. friendships flourishing. gratitude and abundance abounds. breakthroughs in therapy. only flirted with one ex(the one I just can’t, and may never, quit) but now found the restricted feature on insta dms and now if I want to send him a meme I have to check myself first.
truly the only thing that has disturbed my peace in this whole experience is the movie Dracula (1992)— which I will go into at a later date.
I will say that the Femcel experiment is not for everyone— but if you have relationship trauma which impedes your dating discernment, I recommend giving it a shot.
I have decided to further extend my celibacy until I can confidently understand what I want in a relationship, both from myself and for myself. but for now, I can confidently and simply say, I am looking for More.
once again, getting what I want requires great determination and fortitude, and I am willing to sacrifice whatever I need to, to give it to myself.