the first thing to be said is that this recommendation applies equally to everyone
the next thing to be said is that you have, inevitably, been suffering from a cocktail of depression and anxiety for more than a decade, and this has made you incredibly tired
what you need is to make NYE plans with a good friend you haven't seen in years; she will bring you out to the club and it will be fuckin rad; you'll buy some cute clothes and she'll do your makeup, despite these not being things you really ever do, and you'll forget how much you typically disdain your appearance for one night
next, you're going to have to just read for awhile, books and essays and youtube comments and text messages
after enough reading, you'll have your own thoughts and questions, and you'll inevitably see someone else asking the question "am i trans?"
reading this question will naturally lead to you asking yourself: "am i trans?"
the answer is yes
at this point, you have transitioned into a girl, and everything else is just showing off; decide on a new name; get a therapist and a doctor who are supportive; pump your body full of the hormones it needs; get some cute new clothes and burn your old shit; ask for help picking out and doing your makeup
stop treating your body like a shipping container for your sad brain; transform it into the hot girl your brain already knows you are
