just kidding...but also not really. i graduated about a year ago and went straight into a job, and although the dread and despair has mostly subsided, i have continued to struggle with stucturing my personal time + creating space to grow as an autonomous adult. maybe things would be easier if my friends were a little closer. just know you have a whole generation of folks trying to find their way at the same time you are!
oh, and buy that thing you saw on an instagram ad...
Jun 12, 2024
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the trad social media i use the most is instagram. the main reason I stay on it is that it's kind of how i hear about anything that's going on. that includes all the things that make me go "wow I'm so glad I heard about this thing I can do" but also all the things that make me go "aww man âšī¸". been trying to strike a balance with how much of that noise I let into my life right now, so I've been relegating my instagram use to just on my browser on my personal laptop which i leave at home most days.
trying to get back into having a dedicated "screen time" for socials so I can still keep up with things but I'm not just constantly bombarded with notifications and stories and new posts and news and current events and also what my friends are doing and also what local businesses are doing and also what bands and musicians I like are doing and also ADS ADS ADS ADS ALL THE TIME I DONT WANT TO BUY ANY OF THESE LEAVE ME ALLLLOOOONNNE
trying to reclaim my peace of mind and my attention this year. tryna be like this but for the attention economy
Jan 6, 2025
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once i got realistic about what type of content i consumed on ig and twitter, i realized so quickly it was not expanding the way i think and in fact was keeping me stuck in the same (oftentimes negative/harmful) thought loopholes. social media is addictive in part because it algorithmically reproduces the way we already think. it keeps us comfortable.
start questioning: what can help expand your life? what other creative and consumptive outlets do you find fulfilling? is there a book you want to read? something you want to draw or write about? or, in general, consider how your older self would have wanted your time to be spent. you are so right that social media makes us feel Bad-- but we don't have to! it is an act of self-care and deep love to work on stepping away from things that hurt!
as far as practical tips, the best things that helped me were:
a) like some others mentioned, deleting ALL social media apps from my phone so i can only access them on my computer. this helps because the online interfaces are a lot clunkier so it reduces some of the quick gratification that keeps you addicted. also you have to be literally sitting at a desk to use it, so the portability aspect/mindless scrolling is largely removed.
b) keeping a journal because it's a much safer space to dump thoughts than a private story
c) prioritizing in-person connection rather than mediating relationships through tech-- meet a friend for coffee! cultivate intimacy rather than superficiality, and notice how irl vs. online connection feels different
d) nervous system regulation and grounding practices to counteract how scrolling can make you anxious/stressed/disembodied!
finally i did struggle a lot with fomo and being behind on trends at first but then i realized it doesn't really matter. trends are fleeting. even without chronic online-ness i am still funny and relatable and i find it much more interesting to hear about people's lives when i haven't been informed about them in an endless information stream online!!
Oct 31, 2024
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I need a place to archive my thoughts in a dated manner, but also not on instagram. I used to post things pretty frequently on my stories and then have a 'highlights' of the year that I could go back to look at, but now, I am not so comfortable sharing on such a commercial soul sucking platform that is data mining and surveilling and selling. I also feel like I am not, in my core, a good person. There are very few people who, when I see their success and happiness, spark genuine joy for me. For the most, I have to take a deep breath and remind myself that their life does not affect mine and that I should not let the display of their wealth of happiness, opportunity and beauty spoil the pursuit of my own. Some days, I feel so engrossed in knowing and wanting to know the updates of all the people around me. Now, I just want to shrink and disappear, I do not want people to know what I am up to and I do not want to peripherally watch others either. I want to focus on myself. I feel like I need to cut the plug on instagram with a hard delete. Maybe I will just buy myself a photo printer and print out the 'instagram' shots with their memories and make my own photobook instead. But I need to find a new way to document and archive my life.
Feb 8, 2025
Top Recs from @dirtywater_roach
Rated - âī¸âī¸âī¸âī¸
i literally could not care less about trucks - no offense - and i didn't even know what a hardbody was befor i watched this documentary (it's a pickup truck?). nonetheless, this movie made me feel like i understood something new about humanity - maybe something about human resilience or delirious determination.
TLDR; it's a documentary about a competition in Texas where people try to win a pickup truck by being the last person with their hand on the truck. the competition lasted like 77 hours - wild. suffice to say, things get serious and people start crying. apparently quentin tarantino said this was his go-to movie recommendation at some point? Source: Wikipedia lol
Jun 12, 2024
this works best with two people
1. go to a gas station, dollar store, or target - somewhere cheap with a variety of objects - with a friend or partner (note: i love Wawa for this activity)
2. set a budget or total number of objects
3. you and your friend/person will now walk around the store in opposite directions and select random sh*t for each other in secret. collect until you get to your budget or object number limit (i.e., you will be collecting stuff for your friend and your friend will be collecting stuff for you)
4. purchase items in separate lanes for MAXIMUM SECRECY
4.5. if you have no money, you can just meet at the front of the store for the grand reveal and laugh at what you chose for each other
5. meet in car, or wait to get home, and do a grand reveal!!!
6. use or eat the items purchased for longer lasting joy
Jun 12, 2024
Rated - âī¸âī¸âī¸âī¸
"an entire movie built on that awful feeling you get when you're iron-deficient and stand up too fast" - clementine on Letterboxd
great movie on the ridiculousness of american suburban culture - may cause a headache. i have yet to watch another movie that comes close to creating a vibe as rancid as this one. great movie to show friends that you secretly don't like too much. reminds me of what it felt like to move to massachusetts for undergrad.
Jun 12, 2024