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Not sure if this is too niche, but the other day I met with my professor and we talked about how women tend to express themselves hesitantly, softly. Men tend to be assertive, often bordering on arrogant, when they write. I mean, thatâs probably cause women - fem people - have traditionally been socialized in a certain passive manner. Makes me sad sometimes. But not always.
Feb 14, 2025
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and I feel lucky about that; it made me who I am today!
But as an adult woman I can definitely relate and I imagine what it would be like to feel that sense of freedom from being perceived as a woman and the societal expectations that come with that. Sylvia Plath said it best in her journals:
âYes, my consuming desire is to mingle with road crews, sailors and soldiers, barroom regularsâto be a part of a scene, anonymous, listening, recordingâall this is spoiled by the fact that I am a girl, a female always supposedly in danger of assault and battery. My consuming interest in men and their lives is often misconstrued as a desire to seduce them, or as an invitation to intimacy. Yes, God, I want to talk to everybody as deeply as I can. I want to be able to sleep in an open field, to travel west, to walk freely at night...â
I do think though that itâs fruitless to fixate on these things, imagining the grass to be greener on the other side and essentially wishing you could have grown up and lived as another person, because 1 itâs not possible 2 the life you imagine has so many downsides to it too that you canât even imagine not having experienced itself and 3 if you were a different person then the You you are now wouldnât exist, and that would be a shame! I also think men are having a tough time now and many of them are probably just as neurotic, inhibited, and fearful as women.
Obviously people are free to reject these notions and live life as whoever they want, and I respect and appreciate those who choose to do this, but Iâm not interested in doing that for myself. Instead, I challenge the boundaries of what it means to be a woman in the ways that I can, which feels like the right choice for me!
Jun 28, 2024
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i really also think about how much boys are taught ways to perform masculinity & how it is legitimised through tangible things like building a career etc but with women i find that from a young age our identity, behaviours, & thoughts are always spoken about in relation to other people/things â gender roles within the family, how weâre perceived by men, our friendships with other women, our relationships with material things etc etc â and this shows up in the labels that women are often given too! so and so is someoneâs daughter, girlfriend, wife, mother etc etc. i envy the freedom of boyhood so much, the freedom to just be (this is not to discount the toxicity of traditional masculinity, i just think that boys are still afforded more âplayâ and therefore have more opportunities to develop their sense of self).
maybe i am also biased because of how iâve grown up & whatnot but i never really understood what it meant to quote unquote be a woman or perform femininity. i only saw this modelled within my nurturing friendships with women as iâve gotten older but when i was younger, in church it was always âok well donât do this or that because x y z will happen to men if you doâ or within my extended family it was often âare you seeing anyone? when are you having kidsâ. damn what happened to asking about how iâm doing or what my dreams are!!!
long rant sorry !! but thatâs my long winded way of saying âi feel youâ haha
Jun 28, 2024
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When I think about âmy tastesâ in an expansive way, I think the common thread is explorations of femme-nessâ living as a woman, being perceived as a woman, experiencing girlhood, existing as a woman within (or really under) masculine cultures/political structures/households etc. I often joke to my friends that I donât read male authors because I donât want a tourists guide, but I do find that almost all of the art I enjoy is womenâs work.
Favorite artists: Faith Ringold, Camille Claudel, Artemisia Gentileschi, Claudette Johnson
Favorite poets/writers/authors: Maggie OâFarrell, Ada LĂŹmon, bell hooks, Charlotte BrontĂ«, Valeria Luiselli
Favorite directors: Celine Sciamma, Kelly Reichardt, Celine Song, Sarah Polley, Greta Gerwig
Favorite films: Petite Maman, The Worst Person In The World, Frances Ha, Ladybird
Outside of the art I consume, I think my life is very oriented around womanhoodâ my apartment is overtly a womanâs house, my closest friends are women, the ways that I exercise and cook and dress are all intentionally oriented around my womanâs body and itâs cycles and needs but also the expression of being a woman, like not just a human person but a Woman, in the way that bell hooks and Virginia Woolf write about.
Dec 18, 2024
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I'm thinking of getting a library card... they give cool keychain cards with flower patterns. My local library looks out over a river and it's made of red wood.
Feb 10, 2025
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In
1. Cottage cheese
2. Moisturized elbows
3. My DS
4. Solo walks with headphones
5. Poetry
6. Mittens
Out
1. Stale joint
2. Men with a bachelor degree in sociology
3. Hegel
4. Yeasty beer
5. Brown slush
Feb 11, 2025
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Went for a walk, feel alive again. I always forget what a difference getting up from my computer for like 20 mins does to my brain. Feeling #unstoppable #livin #breathin #walkin
Feb 10, 2025