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I think i had an unusually adventurous and fairly gender neutral upbringing

and I feel lucky about that; it made me who I am today! But as an adult woman I can definitely relate and I imagine what it would be like to feel that sense of freedom from being perceived as a woman and the societal expectations that come with that. Sylvia Plath said it best in her journals: “Yes, my consuming desire is to mingle with road crews, sailors and soldiers, barroom regulars—to be a part of a scene, anonymous, listening, recording—all this is spoiled by the fact that I am a girl, a female always supposedly in danger of assault and battery. My consuming interest in men and their lives is often misconstrued as a desire to seduce them, or as an invitation to intimacy. Yes, God, I want to talk to everybody as deeply as I can. I want to be able to sleep in an open field, to travel west, to walk freely at night...” I do think though that it’s fruitless to fixate on these things, imagining the grass to be greener on the other side and essentially wishing you could have grown up and lived as another person, because 1 it’s not possible 2 the life you imagine has so many downsides to it too that you can’t even imagine not having experienced itself and 3 if you were a different person then the You you are now wouldn’t exist, and that would be a shame! I also think men are having a tough time now and many of them are probably just as neurotic, inhibited, and fearful as women. Obviously people are free to reject these notions and live life as whoever they want, and I respect and appreciate those who choose to do this, but I’m not interested in doing that for myself. Instead, I challenge the boundaries of what it means to be a woman in the ways that I can, which feels like the right choice for me!

@taterhole

Jun 28, 2024

5

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Being a girl

Historically, I have been too insecure to be a girl. That pressure of prettiness, of being delicate, of being desirable. I refused to engage. But this year something has shifted. I love cardigans, I want to talk about how I do my hair, I learned how to do make-up. Even though I'm not a model, I adore making myself feel pretty and sexy. I'm falling in love with the culture of feminism, and reclaiming mother earth as a mother. Girlhood is something so insanely precious and now, despite it being so hard, I am so unbelievably grateful I get to experience it. Want to merge my soul with every woman on the planet and scream OH HOW I LOVE BEING A WOMAN!

@rozzyfux

Jan 17, 2025

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The performance of boyhood

i really also think about how much boys are taught ways to perform masculinity & how it is legitimised through tangible things like building a career etc but with women i find that from a young age our identity, behaviours, & thoughts are always spoken about in relation to other people/things — gender roles within the family, how we’re perceived by men, our friendships with other women, our relationships with material things etc etc — and this shows up in the labels that women are often given too! so and so is someone’s daughter, girlfriend, wife, mother etc etc. i envy the freedom of boyhood so much, the freedom to just be (this is not to discount the toxicity of traditional masculinity, i just think that boys are still afforded more “play” and therefore have more opportunities to develop their sense of self). maybe i am also biased because of how i’ve grown up & whatnot but i never really understood what it meant to quote unquote be a woman or perform femininity. i only saw this modelled within my nurturing friendships with women as i’ve gotten older but when i was younger, in church it was always “ok well don’t do this or that because x y z will happen to men if you do” or within my extended family it was often “are you seeing anyone? when are you having kids”. damn what happened to asking about how i’m doing or what my dreams are!!! long rant sorry !! but that’s my long winded way of saying “i feel you” haha

@addycyl

Jun 28, 2024

2

Top Recs from @willtiism

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life would be easier if i was a boy i think

i jsut want to be a freshly-graduated optimistic member of an underground (but rising) boyband...

@willtiism

Feb 17, 2025

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kpop is making me feel some big feelings rn. i may cry

i love love love kpop so much but for the last two years ive sorta pushed it aside and at some points gone months without listening to it at all... ill still listen to new skz but thats it, i havent really listened to anyone else's new music since 2023. now im shuffling my 69-hours-long kpop playlist and every single song is insanely nostalgic to me 😭 a lot of how im feeling right now is probably the nostalgia but GOD I JUST LOVE KPOP SO MUCH. it was my main biggest interest from 2021-2023 it was genuienly all i cared about and it may sound stupid but all my favorite groups, skz, drippin, bts, free pass, twice.. they were there for me back when i had genuinely zero friends and nobody in my life who cared what i had to say. so how could i not feel the strongest emotional connection to them and their music ? sure it sounds parasocial but its what kept me alive back then and thats worth more than you could ever cringe at. anyway, hearing all these songs that were the only things keeping me going every day now that i am a healed person with lovely friends who i love so much and a genuinely amazing living situation that i used to hope for while crying myself to sleep ... its such a beautiful feeling. and everything that is beautiful should make you happy, but it is always sad as well. im sad because i love this music and i love the people who made it with my entire heart. and now i feel like a traitor to them. i have spent over a year ignoring anything that happened in the realm of korean music not because i decided to turn on it but because i simply found other interests. so why do i feel selfish and evil for finding new things to love just as much ? maybe because i feel there is no other thing i could feel as emotionally affected by as i do by kpop. and i know i sound stupid saying this because (especially to people who dont like kpop) because "its just some random pop music from a different country", or maybe im making up these voices because im still scarred by what people said to me when i was more open about my love for kpop. in any case, im just having a lot of big feelings right now. felt the need to get them out in one way or another, so that all these words dont sit in my mind with nowhere to go for too long. i know too well how that ends up making me feel in the end.

@willtiism

Feb 23, 2025

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no motivation in this world except for when my teachers say im a good student

makes me smile like a derpy frog

@willtiism

Feb 17, 2025