I love my partner, and doing monogamy has made me learn a lot of things about myself, and I love being able to share so much with him, but I‘ve been missing what it felt like to have multiple people I was infatuated with. I feel like I am a lover boy deep beneath it all, and being able to be a lover boy with everyone without worrying about crossing my partners boundaries was a very free feeling. Now, when I harmlessly flirt, I get an immense amount of guilt overthinking if I took it too far. Finding lovers throughout your life is what makes life worth living. Being romantically involved with someone has a way of changing everything about your life in so many lovely ways. Little gifts, little kisses. Wine drunk, and giggling. Best friends become lovers become friends again.
Feb 28, 2025

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i don't limit love to just a romantic partner. I have a queer platonic life partner (long word for my best friend) whom I love muchly. I have many people I love in different capacities, but no one in particular currently that I share a romantic love with! I keep my heart open to allowing love to meet us where we're at, to which capacity it evolves to
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Every person brings different qualities out in us and our connections with these people lead us down different paths. These missed connections aren’t even necessarily about the person themselves but about the life you could have lived together and the changes they would have brought about in you. It does require a kind of mourning to be able to let go. It’s tragic when there’s someone you feel so compatible with but the circumstances just weren’t quite right—I’ve definitely experienced this myself—but these connections exist in their context. Everyone we touch can’t be our forever love, but they can stay with us forever in our hearts. Love can take so many forms outside of the confines of a traditional relationship. Think of what you shared with them as a gift, rather than dwelling on what could have been.
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Just cause you’re single doesn’t mean your alone. Loving your friends/family/community is just as satisfying as loving a romantic partner and will reduce feralness.
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