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FUCK SOCIAL MEDIA. Im obsessed with it. how could i not be? it seems to be one of the few ways my body can get dopamine other than inhaling burning plants and reading fun facts. So, without warning to my loyal instagram story likers who are probably scared and crying and lost without me (no one noticed), i deleted the apps. then I went outside. i sat by the river and let the sun do it's thing. boom: phat hit of dopamine. but the real kind. Saw a mama bald eagle and a teen baldie hunting together. boom: thinking about something other than myself. wondering if the teen ate any of his siblings. wondering what the mom will do when he goes off on his own. is she proud of him? do they argue? but then i remember they're birds and dont work like that. just like that im back in my body again, demystified by the impassive nature of birds. ugh. then my hands reached for my phone without thinking. i cursed at myself. all social media does is distract, because when i try to relax without it, i get antsy from craving other stimuli. but what am i trying to distract myself from? my own thoughts? how sad is that? why cant i just sit somewhere and think for awhile and feel fulfilled? the sun is still out. birds still flying overhead, and i'm thinking about my need for distraction–– a distraction within itself. this is what social media has done to me. i feel stuck in a big ole sticky spider web called the internet and have no fucking idea where else to satisfy my dopamine addicted brain. (so anyway, hiiii perfectly imperfecttttt xxoxoxxoxo hope u can help me reestablish my relationship with the interweb? i need a fix from somewhere im a junkie!!!!!!!!!! )

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once i got realistic about what type of content i consumed on ig and twitter, i realized so quickly it was not expanding the way i think and in fact was keeping me stuck in the same (oftentimes negative/harmful) thought loopholes. social media is addictive in part because it algorithmically reproduces the way we already think. it keeps us comfortable. start questioning: what can help expand your life? what other creative and consumptive outlets do you find fulfilling? is there a book you want to read? something you want to draw or write about? or, in general, consider how your older self would have wanted your time to be spent. you are so right that social media makes us feel Bad-- but we don't have to! it is an act of self-care and deep love to work on stepping away from things that hurt! as far as practical tips, the best things that helped me were: a) like some others mentioned, deleting ALL social media apps from my phone so i can only access them on my computer. this helps because the online interfaces are a lot clunkier so it reduces some of the quick gratification that keeps you addicted. also you have to be literally sitting at a desk to use it, so the portability aspect/mindless scrolling is largely removed. b) keeping a journal because it's a much safer space to dump thoughts than a private story c) prioritizing in-person connection rather than mediating relationships through tech-- meet a friend for coffee! cultivate intimacy rather than superficiality, and notice how irl vs. online connection feels different d) nervous system regulation and grounding practices to counteract how scrolling can make you anxious/stressed/disembodied! finally i did struggle a lot with fomo and being behind on trends at first but then i realized it doesn't really matter. trends are fleeting. even without chronic online-ness i am still funny and relatable and i find it much more interesting to hear about people's lives when i haven't been informed about them in an endless information stream online!!
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in the age of endless access to information, the unknown can quickly become known - though i think we've reached a point where balance is desperately needed. our brains are sensitive and absorbing information constantly whether we like it or not. i recently deleted social media from my phone and now only log on at the computer (love how many pi.fyi recs i've seen on this) - anyways i finally joined the club and see no going back. i don't want to know everything about everyone all the time and on top of that be plagued with intrusive ads (no matter how relevant they may or may not be). being present is crucial, and watching other people's lives on our phones whenever we want can definitely take one out of the present. if i were a true conspiracy theorist, i'd say it almost seems strategically designed to interrupt our normal train of thoughts and give everybody add and make us less thoughtful or make us stray from our true path. i think there's an art to boredom and liminal zones. if you're in a doctor's office waiting room or in a coffee shop waiting for your drink, i think its cool to just be nothing for a moment, limbo is a luxury and giving your consciousness and attention to something every second strips you of that temporary feeling... if we're homies and not seeing each other in person we can text about our lives. instagram stories have begun to creep me out, i don't like how normalized casual stalking has become. i feel like it makes everyone overly analytical and constantly thinking about social dynamics all the time, injecting way too many forms of micro-anxieties for everyone throughout the day - there's value in time spent alone with our thoughts and i feel like the status quo of social media and internet without boundaries at the moment is infringing on some timeless human functions. that said we need to connect and find out about things and discover each other and using platforms like pi.fyi and instagram allow us to do so, we just need to be mindful about how we go about it. i think it's okay to not know everything all the time, mystery creates intrigue and that's stimulating enough for me...
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do y’all ever think about getting off social media but then you worry about how you’ll keep in touch with your friends? i’ve been thinking about this a lot bc i wanna delete ig but it’s where i talk to some of my rly close friends. i hate that it monopolizes connection like that. but i also had this realization that like the people i follow/follow me on ig are not “friends” they’re just superficial connections. real, deep, long meaningful relationships (which i’m craving) i think do require me to get the fuck offline and take the time i was mindlessly scrolling and putting it back into myself or my friends is where i’ll see the greatest positive feedback. and being PRESENT in those relationships. i feel like this is what that book the dopamine generation is about butttttt haven’t read it yet.
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