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I don’t actually want you to surf. Already there are too many surfers. If you do try surfing, you will not look cool—you will look like a kook. The worst look in the world. After years of embarrassment, maybe, maybe you will learn to ride a wave without looking like a kook. Still, the ocean will try to kill you constantly because, fundamentally, you remain a kook. But being so close to death where life on Earth started will cause you to reassess your place in the natural world. You will never dump your petroleum lube down a storm drain that leads to the ocean. You will never eat goosefish because it’s in the red on Seafoodwatch.org. You will learn to laugh at yourself, because in one way or another, we’re all kooks flailing to keep from drowning. On second thought, I actually do want you to start surfing. If you’re in Los Angeles hit me up, I have an extra board you can borrow.
Apr 3, 2023
Related Recs
I moved to LA from NY a few years ago, and I gotta say if you aren’t going to the beach you're an idiot! Most of us are an hour drive from some of the most beautiful beaches in the world! I hit all the beaches - and will even drive out to Laguna - IDGAF. I love going into the ocean, it makes me feel alive. When the water's calm I like to float and let my mind wander. I’ve come up with some of my best ideas out there. I also have been tumbled by some really strong waves - scary stuff - gotta respect the tide. The sun and the ocean really help me feel alive. If I’m bummed and I go to the beach, the next day I always feel better. It’s magic - we are a species that needs sun! Buy an umbrella if you don’t like the sun and just stare at the ocean. It’s beautiful. I’ve seen dolphins and whales many times in California. Bring a cooler and throw out your trash. Sorry to be such an environmentalist.
Mar 21, 2025
Jan 31, 2025
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get in the ocean where and when there are waves and improvise. your pains will go away, physical and existential. if the surf is high, wear fins.
Sep 8, 2023
Top Recs from @jon-lindsey
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That thing is your style. Probably it’s still raw, which is why others don’t see what you see. Refine your thing, your idiosyncrasy. Sharpen it but don’t smooth out all the rough edges, these are what stick in people’s brains. Be inelegant. Be brave.
Apr 3, 2023
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You have to be a member to shop here. Members only. Sorry. It’s called luxury branding. Can’t let just anybody in on these deals. These softer than soft, warm, fuzzy deals. Better luck in the next life. What’s that, you don’t need a membership to buy online? Aw naw!
Apr 3, 2023
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Ancient Egyptians believed that once you die your soul makes a leap into this spot in the heavens. There you must pass a series of tests before gaining entry into the afterlife. New Year’s Eve 2020, I smoked DMT in a hotel room in Orlando, Florida and tried to astral project myself to the nebula. Luckily, I went somewhere else. To find the Orion Nebula in the night sky look to the constellation of Orion, below his belt, at a cluster of light some say is his sword but looks like his penis.
Apr 3, 2023