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This place is pretty weird. Even the name–what does it mean? Whenever I come here it’s either completely empty or there’s like three jacked dudes posted up solo in different corners. Before ordering I’ll always read the poster that’s hanging up in full:Working out - is my partyProtein shakes - are my beerPreworkouts - are my shotsThe pump - is my buzz The pain the next morning - is my hangover!I don’t totally understand gym culture, but you don’t have to understand something fully in order to love it. Anyways, the food is good and relatively cheap and it’s one of those restaurants that never has music playing, which I often prefer.
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Had friends bring me here a while back. It’s got all the pros: priced right ☑️ open late ☑️ delicious ☑️ — any reviews you see now might be like “oooo this was better before it became known by so many people” — ignore those entirely. It’s still phenomenal and well worth stopping by.
Aug 23, 2024
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Listen, I love food, right? You know what I don’t love though? Paying a lot of money for it and waiting 45 minutes for it to be cooked. Why do people obsess over restaurants? Why pay $200 tabs for food you could get for $10 next to your apartment in New York and have it ready within 5 minutes? I simply don’t understand this phenomenon. Is it to reaffirm your social status and financial comfort to those around you? I don’t know, I won’t do personal attacks, but listen, next time you have to wait an hour just to be seated at a restaurant? Just remember who told you about the Bodega meta, an extremely viable and cost effective way of eating.
May 18, 2021
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Restaurants without IG photo-op neon signs. Non-specialty burgers. Vanilla ice cream. Listening to music by some guys with guitars. The Cheesecake Factory. Drinks without probiotic benefits. Sick of the gimmicky shit
things can be normal
Nov 2, 2023
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I grew up being painfully shy with anyone other than my closest friends. I got sick of that. Over the years I’ve grown into a confident person by doing as much scary shit as I can. If there’s something I find particularly terrifying, like accepting an invitation to attend a clowning class, it means to me I have to just fucking do it. I don’t always end up having good experiences following my fear, but more often than not, I do. And you know, worst case scenario I end up with a funny story? Eating shit is good for you. If there’s something that keeps floating into your consciousness, but you’re afraid to poke it, I recommend walking towards it!
Apr 5, 2023
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I first got into Devin The Dude (shoutout to Houston) during a lil chopped and screwed phase in high school, but it wasn’t until a few years ago that I first heard “See What I Could Pull,” and it caught me. I get obsessed with things, but I’ve never gotten unobsessed with this song. It’s unlike any other song I know of, and it’s stayed in my weekly rotation.
Apr 5, 2023
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My beautiful and elegant friend Roya makes clocks out of pita bread. I have trouble reading my clock, but time is not fundamentally real anyway. You can cop one by DMing @empty_vassal on IG. If there’s a little wait, it’s because her oven only holds enough space for her to dry out two at a time (the first step in curing them). Bonus! 50% of the proceeds go to the White Helmets 🫶
Apr 5, 2023