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I grew up being painfully shy with anyone other than my closest friends. I got sick of that. Over the years I’ve grown into a confident person by doing as much scary shit as I can. If there’s something I find particularly terrifying, like accepting an invitation to attend a clowning class, it means to me I have to just fucking do it. I don’t always end up having good experiences following my fear, but more often than not, I do. And you know, worst case scenario I end up with a funny story? Eating shit is good for you. If there’s something that keeps floating into your consciousness, but you’re afraid to poke it, I recommend walking towards it!
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this year has been all about getting “out there” for me. since i’ve been doing concert photography more, i’ve come to realize that it really never hurts to ask - even if the ask seems outlandish at the time. if the opportunity doesn’t open itself up to you, then it wasn’t meant for you anyways!
i am someone who deals with imposter syndrome quite a bit, and i’ve had to come to realize that i have to do the scary things in order for me to achieve what i want to (and to make them not so scary over time)!
this applies to relationships as well, but i’m not so much focused on that in this particular phase of life as i am on my hobbies/career.
anyways: DO THE SCARY THING. ASK THE SCARY/CRAZY QUESTION. YOU’LL NEVER KNOW WHAT WILL HAPPEN IF YOU DON’T TRY. DON’T LIVE A LIFE OF “WHAT IFS”!
(this is aggressive bc i’m mostly trying to remind myself of it)
Oct 14, 2024
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Not on some hustle self improvement shit, but trying on an attitude of more engagement with the world instead of fear and avoidance. Recently being saying yes to things that I used to put off like playing pickup basketball (ball is life), lifting (lol hell yeah bro), socializing with people outside my usual and things I was too nervous about like public speaking and taking up space. And surprise surprise, getting over it and doing those challenging things is never as bad as I thought it was going to be. My brain is firing in ways that make me feel less melancholy and more alive. My dreams are more vivid, I feel more present and self determined and life feels a little richer. Just do it ✔️
Jun 16, 2024
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sometimes doing a thing feels so scary and so terrifying and like there's a giant abyss in front of you. you have no way of knowing what's on the other side because all you can see is the darkness. there is so much fear in the unknown. but sometimes being just a little bit brave, even for just a few seconds, can make all the difference. some of the best things i've gotten out of life came out of doing something i was terrified of. take the risk...enter the abyss...the rest of your life might be on the other side of it!!!!
Mar 6, 2024
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I first got into Devin The Dude (shoutout to Houston) during a lil chopped and screwed phase in high school, but it wasn’t until a few years ago that I first heard “See What I Could Pull,” and it caught me. I get obsessed with things, but I’ve never gotten unobsessed with this song. It’s unlike any other song I know of, and it’s stayed in my weekly rotation.
Apr 5, 2023
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I work out unclothed in my room. It’s less restrictive than working out in athletic wear, and of course it means I cut down on laundry days. On YouTube I bounce between Caroline Girvan and Madfit. Outside of YouTube my friend Sadie lets me use her Sculpt Society account (I almost called it Pilate Pals). Working out is so addictive–mostly I love to feel strong. I had a phase of using fitness metaphors often and sincerely, but I think that’s behind us now.
Apr 5, 2023
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This place is pretty weird. Even the name–what does it mean? Whenever I come here it’s either completely empty or there’s like three jacked dudes posted up solo in different corners. Before ordering I’ll always read the poster that’s hanging up in full:Working out - is my partyProtein shakes - are my beerPreworkouts - are my shotsThe pump - is my buzz The pain the next morning - is my hangover!I don’t totally understand gym culture, but you don’t have to understand something fully in order to love it. Anyways, the food is good and relatively cheap and it’s one of those restaurants that never has music playing, which I often prefer.
Apr 5, 2023