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Taking care of yourself can feel hideously step-by-step now… scientific and ingredient-laden. Brushing your hair still feels whimsical and wild! It’s genuinely a therapeutic process for me, I think because I have a lot of hair and untangling it sometimes requires brute force and since there is a clear before and after to behold, it always makes me feel better if I’m feeling low. There’s a lot of propaganda around messy hair (Chloe S., French women), but life is about getting to know yourself. So if you’re feeling burnt out on cold little serums and vials of goo (all love though) or are tired of letting the rats' nests rule, try brushing your hair more. Caveat that you need to find the hair brush that works for you—doesn’t have to be made of boar bristles and mother of pearl,I like the OG brush from Olivia Garden over at Ulta.
Mar 27, 2023
Related Recs
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Wear clothes that fit and drape well on your shape. Replace sloppy looking or worn out staple pieces with things that look a little more intentional and serious but are still comfortable and feel true to you (ex: instead of sweatpants wear pull-on cigarette pants). Wear fewer accessories and let the simplicity shine through. A nice signature scent might help.
Keep your skin clean, moisturized, and exfoliated (try peel pads like the ones from First Aid Beauty or Nip/Fab). Wear sunscreen or whatever 🙄 If you wear makeup, do a tinted moisturizer, use an angled brush to fill in your brows with cool-toned shadow for some light definition, curl your lashes, wear mascara, wear a flattering shade of red lipstick and pat that lipstick onto your cheeks as blush—maybe do a shimmery pale or a smoky brown shadow tapped onto the lid with your fingertips (cream shadow is great for this) + some pencil eyeliner at the roots of the lashes and on your upper waterline.
Keep your hair looking as clean as you possibly can. If you’re using dry shampoo, do it preemptively before you go to sleep to absorb oil rather than in the morning when you wake up—spray it all along your roots and massage it into the hair in the morning. I actually do not brush my hair because it stretches it out and makes it lose its shape; I put it up in a bonnet when I go to sleep to keep it from getting tangled but still looking tousled, textured, and voluminous at the roots. I do comb through it with my fingers and I use a wet brush before I shower, as I rinse, and when I condition. My wash routine lately has been Trader Joe’s cleansing conditioner then Giovanni 2chic ultra moist shampoo!
Learn to style your hair with a round brush (I know this is a really tough one but it makes a big difference)!!!! I really enjoy the hot styling brush tools but they’re apparently damaging to the hair because they have no heat settings and they put a lot of tension and friction on the hair. If you have a few hundred to drop though I’ve heard great things about the Shark FlexFusion and FlexStyle. But whatever you do… use a heat protectant.
I style my hair if I have somewhere important to go but otherwise I do air dry— I put it up in a cotton T-shirt to soak up most of the water—and I use an air drying crème while it’s still damp. I think having a good hairstylist is also really important and will take you a long way. My relationship with mine is probably one of the most precious things in my life and I’ve been going to him for about three years now.
I’m honestly never going to look put together like other people seem to naturally be able to do and I’m always going to remain feral on some level but this is what works for me! My version of doing the bare minimum 🫶
Feb 4, 2025
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I know I sound insane and disgusting but quitting brushing my (fine but dense) hair has been the best thing I’ve done for it. I’ve been able to cut down to like two washes per week (with cleansing conditioner and a hair mask) and even on wash day it looks voluminous, textured, and lived-in instead of flat and greasy… many curly girls do this already but I’m here to suggest it for others as well… try just giving it a little toss upside down and a finger comb instead of brushing and put it up when you sleep to keep knots from forming
Oct 10, 2024
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makes me feel like A prince or an expensive neurotic puppy in a tiny handbag
Mar 15, 2024
Top Recs from @biz-sherbert
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Bar Italia is a classic spot in the Soho neighborhood of London. The best for people watching and generally feeling like you’re in it. The patronage is diverse: bikers, tweedy intellectual families, Italians, women in white skinny jeans sitting on mens laps. Getting a table outside at night on a weekend can be difficult, but it is worth stalking the movements of whoever looks like they’re on their last sip of cappuccino. I’m not sure exactly what the history is, but you can just tell there’s history, which is a special thing in its own.
Mar 27, 2023
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Growing up, I heard a lot about the famous Neiman Marcus chocolate chip cookies, kind of like when you’re a kid and people are always talking about acid rain, quick sand and piranhas so you think it’s statistically inevitable that you’ll run into them. To that point, I’ve still never had a cookie from Neiman’s, but I do hope they’re still churning them out. I have, however, had a rotisserie chicken at Harrods. There’s something that feels so vintage about eating in a luxury department store, it’s one of the most ladies-who-lunchiest things you can do nowadays. It’s instant glamor for the whittled soul. Having a drink is also fun—loosens up the shopping experience, liquid ease if you’re the sort to feel anxious when looking at things you can’t afford. Time definitely moves differently in these places, too—it’s all a bit ‘island of the lotus eaters.’ If you’re in London, the rotisserie restaurant in Harrods is good, dark, and savory and the wine bar at the bottom of Fortnum and Mason is a nice place to pass the time (also recommend the lemon and vanilla marmalade from the floor above).
Mar 27, 2023