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even if that’s watching the movie playtime or having it play in the background while you work
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Jan 22, 2024

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yesterday, I sat in a movie theater, watching a 5/5 film, but somewhere between the frames, I slipped away in my own world. my eyes wandered around the room, scanning the foam-lined walls, the dust resting on cushioned seats, the soft glow of the screen flickering against strangers' faces. for a moment, I was no longer in the film— I was in my own world, watching, unnoticed, in a room full of people, feeling as though i am in a film myself. it happens in the classroom too— pens scratching, pages turning, heads bent in deep concentration. and yet, I lift my gaze, watching the quiet rhythm of work, as if the scene before me is unfolding on a screen, as if I am only passing through. maybe it’s a habit of slipping between worlds. one foot in reality, the other in observation. caught between being present and stepping back, seeing life not just as it is, but as a scene, a story, a moment unfolding. perhaps that’s the beauty of it — to exist both within and outside, to live and to notice, to be part of something yet still see it from afar.
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Seeking shelter in my catholic elementary school that has a cathedral inside the cathedral. Riding a Disneyland dark ride through every home I lived in as a kid. Driving down a highway that I understand to be inside of the Infinite Jest cover. Seeing a Tarantino movie about my friend in a theater that’s part-Pantheon part-hospital from Silent Hill 2. Usually nothing really happens, I’m just sitting or walking around watching everyone else exist. They almost always feel melancholic/stilted, but I really enjoy it! I try and draw them in my dreams note if I can remember once I wake up
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