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i will admit that smoking is one of the chicest and sexiest things you can do...... however i have weak lungs which is obviously deeply unchic. most of my friends smoke, and if there’s one thing i hate, it’s missing out on The Convo.
i was following my friends out and scrolling on my phone as they smoked, but it didn’t fully replicate the feeling of something special in my hands. now, i take a $7 acupressure pen out with me and do facial massage while everyone lights up. i hold a lot of tension in my face, and i’ve found that timing facial massage to friends’ smoke breaks has really improved my stress&my sleep&the quality of my skin. do with that what you will. we should all be Goopmaxxing.
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i finally decided to quit smoking for good this year. however…the one thing holding me back was the wonderful, communal feeling of sharing a cig with strangers outside a bar.
luckily, you can always be the person with the lighter on hand when people need one.
you still experience that nice, warm bonding feeling without actually smoking. plus you’re being of service to others, which deepens the connection <3
Feb 10, 2024
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started buying my own cigs at the start of last year to get through a rough patch. it was me and my marlboro golds against the world back then. was too broke to afford to buy them super regularly so i'd have to ration over weeks. and luckily (not really) my friends also started smoking around the same time so i could bum off them if need be. i've been quitting since i properly started and i haven't bought a pack in a while now. moved onto strictly social smoking but i go out often enough it makes this a tad redundant. i don't desperately fiend for it as much, i could hardly finish the last one i had but god does a drunk cig feel good af.
also as someone who does biomed, your reminder and mine that smoking is really bad for you btw!!! we really need to invent smoking that isn't a health hazard.
Apr 9, 2024
Ever since I quit nicotine I don't deprive myself of a cigarette when I feel like I really need it. So it hits different, because when my emotional state is low all it takes is a cig break to feel like I'm confronting whatever it is that's weighing me down. This system is fool-proof. Sometimes I think I'm low enough for a cigarette then decide I'm not quite sad enough. So when I do smoke it's because I'm crying & absolutely losing it. Because my smoke breaks are spontaneous, I can't quite plan for them, leading to unfinished packs & a plethora of lighters. Funny enough, each lighter coincides with whatever was making me feel awful that day making it a journal of sorts for my feelings. My fav is the "take me with you" lighter because well.. I really related to that when I bought it. There's also something really protagonist-y about walking into a gas station, eyes puffy & tears streaming down your face & asking for a pack of camel menthols ... oh & a swag lighter.
Sep 19, 2024
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i <3 to comment on people's posts, cold email them, reply to their stories, etc. be not inhospitable to strangers lest they be angels in disguise baby!
Jan 22, 2024
So ok when I was a child running in the night — afraid of what might be hiding in the dark, hiding in the street, and what was following me — the hounds of love were hunting me! I've always been a coward! I don't know what's good for me. Oh, here I go... it's coming for me through the trees!!!!!! Oh, help me, someone, help me, please!!!!!!!! Take my shoes off and throw them in the lake and I'll be two steps on the water. I found a fox caught by dogs. He let me take him in my hands. His little heart, it beat so fast, and I'm ashamed of running away. I mean, from nothing real, I just can't deal with this... I'm still afraid to be there. Among the hounds of love. And to feel your arms surround me. I've always been a coward and have never known what's good for me. Oh here I go... don't let me go... hold me down... it's coming for me through the trees!!!!! Help me, darling! Help me, please!!!!!!!!! Take my shoes off and throw them in the lake and I'll be two steps on the water. I don't know what's good for me, I don't know what's good for me... I need love! Your love. And take your shoes off and throw them in the lake. Do you know what I really need? Do you know what I really need? LOVE!
Jan 31, 2024
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its beautiful
Jan 27, 2024