The days I donât want to kill myself
are extraordinary. Deep bass. All the people
in the streets waiting for their high fives
and leaping, I mean leaping,
when they see me. I am the sun-filled
god of love. Or at least an optimistic
under-secretary. There should be a word for it.
The days you wake up and do not want
to slit your throat. Money in the bank.
Enough for an iced green tea every weekday
and Saturday and Sunday! Itâs like being
in the armpit of a Hammond B3 organ.
Just reeks of gratitude and funk.
The funk of ages. I am not going to ruin
my loveâs life today. Itâs like the time I said yes
to gray sneakers but then the salesman said
Wait. And there, out of the back room,
like the bakeryâs first biscuits: bright-blue kicks.
Iridescent. Like a scarab! Oh, who am I kidding,
it was nothing like a scarab! It was like
bright. blue. fucking. sneakers! I did not
want to die that day. Oh, my God.
Why donât we talk about it? How good it feels.
And if you donât know then youâre lucky
but also you poor thing. Bring the band out on the stoop.
Let the whole neighborhood hear. Come on, Everybody.
Say it with me nice and slow
âââno pillsââno cliffââno brains on the floor
Bring the bass back.ââââno ropeââno hoseâânot today,
Satan.
Every day I wake up with my good fortune
and news of my demise. Donât keep it from me.
Why donât we have a name for it?
Bring the bass back. Bring the band out on the stoop.
Hallelujah!