Feb 23, 2024
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it sucks but also maybe not...?!
Feb 11, 2024
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You have so much free time
Feb 21, 2024
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I put my two weeks notice in last Wednesday. In four business days, I will be completely, comprehensively unemployed. Iām going to be a bartender next. You might see me around. I look like if a five year old Bob Dylan got HGH injected into his brain stem to make him much bigger than the other five year olds. Iāll pour you a drink. One mooooree cup of coffee āfore ya goooooo.
My obese boss got laid off last month. My only regret is not being able to invent a shrink ray in time. A shrink ray to shrink him down & ash out a cigarette on his fat little belly & put a burn on him. Seared pork belly.
After he got laid off, the top brass at the company got wise to the fact that I hadnt sold a single bottle of alcohol in the entire year Iāve been working at this alcohol sales job. My boss was extremely incompetent & lazy, more than I could have ever dreamed of being. Thatās how I got away with it.
They didnāt confront me, they didnāt even write me upā they simply asked me to be more on the ball. They wanted me to start working. š¤®š¤¢š¤¢š¤®. I quit within the week. Iāve had some good moments last couple of weeks. I fell asleep while sitting front row during a presentation at a regional conference. I couldnāt help it. It wasnāt even that I was tired. It wasnāt that the speaker was boring (though he was). It was his self satisfaction. The guy talking was upper middle management at an extremely prestigious household name whiskey company. But he talked & dressed like a puffed up substitute teacher. Checkered oxford shirt, skinny chinos, a watch that said āmy wife & I have been in a sexless marriage for 6 years. Not that I care. I have PIED chronic death grip syndrome. Iām addicted to JOI femdom findom from Finlandā . But he was talking as if he was better than me, as if I should aspire to be like him. This, I think, is what offended me so deeply. I did hate his style too thoughā Iām no marianoleonczik , but even I can tell when a guy is a total fucking loser based off what heās wearing.
So I nodded off. I allowed top eyelid to kiss bottom eyelid one too many times & I awoke to him standing in front of me. āHey, buddyā you gotta wake up. You canāt be asleep like that.ā I was so stunned I didnāt know what to do but laugh. I tried to cover it up with a cough, but it wasnāt any use I donāt think. Everyone at the company saw me doze off and wake up giggling & coughing in this guys face. Like I was one of the drunks whose lives we ruin for money about to get kicked out of the bar.
Thatās my happiest memory of actually being at work on this job.
Jun 7, 2024
Top Recs from @magdajtaylor
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not too early yet early enough to feel a vague sense of superiority as a ācreativeā who makes their own schedule and could hypothetically sleep till noon
Dec 11, 2023
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going braless is very cool and fun and sexy but you know what??? overrated!!! give me that big round propped up look! and donāt even get me started on those unlined brasā¦.
Sep 18, 2024
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when I feel as though I have too much libidinal energy to spare, I'll download a new game from the app store. I decided to try out "Travel Town," which is really just a blown up narrative version of 2048, and it immediately trapped me. well yes you can have $3.99 so I can get a pack of energy and diamonds, here you go!!
Feb 21, 2024