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Had a moment last night where I was stacking menus at work and staring out the window and kind of asked myself, “do I really need to stay here?”. Idk, money is important, but I think I’d rather work somewhere that lets my personality shine rather than makes me feel unappreciated and devalued. Makes me feel kinda bad that I decided this is normal instead of sticking up for myself. ~~~not sure what to do ~~~~ :/
Mar 23, 2024
Related Recs
Working in film / generally a creative field in a big city can lead me moving very...very fast. I realised sometimes I lose sight of myself and my inner desires and dreams. Sure, it's great to do that one job that seems big at the moment, but have you spent some time alone to think hey - what is it that I really want? Big picture? Outside of what's deemed as "fame" and "successful" or "cool" to your peers...?
Oct 25, 2024
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i have been home from uni for a while over christmas break. i think about this often but i genuinely believe that uni has allowed me to grow so much as a person, to find the parts of myself that i really needed, and to understand the importance of connecting with others. and it is lovely to go home and be able to see my familiar environments in a new light based on things i have experienced at uni. but it does hurt me how easy it still is, despite all this, for me to fall back into my old habits when i am at home; being unproductive, doom scrolling, the way i can actively feel myself wasting time. i am aware that these are things that negatively impact my mood, and yet i still find myself caught up in them. i wish i understood why i do this. maybe it is the fact that i was working so hard at uni and i have simply crashed here. i have come to understand the concept of taking a real break fairly recently. but i feel as though a break should be healing. and i just wish i could read, or post on here, do things that i know will inspire me as default, instead of reverting to actions that make me feel worse. i believe i can get to that point, every day is a new day and a new chance to live it the way i want to. i am doing my best. maybe my mind is at conflict with itself; it needs a break, but also needs to feel productive, so it does neither. i am working on finding the balance. everything is a work in progress.
Dec 28, 2024
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Maybe perhaps i have been weaponizing my rest too much… like yes rest is important but i feel like it has made me lazy and resistant to change…….
Sep 16, 2024
Top Recs from @masteroogway
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Maybe I’m posting this to justify my spending habits, or maybe I’m just ~correct~. Sometimes what I have in my house and the amount of available energy I have simply isn’t enough to satisfy the very specific craving I have that I just KNOW is the elixir to all my problems in that moment. Money is fake, fuck it, I’m hungry.
Mar 31, 2024
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One of the most romantic connections I’ve ever had in my life was someone who acknowledged how “brilliant” and mischievous my mind is. (They ghosted me BUT) I’ve been kinda going through some shi and made a list of why I love my brain. Really deep diving into why I like the way it thinks and categorizes things and keeps me focused or distracts me, etc. It’s been cool to observe yourself from a distance like that. It’s also nice to just give yourself some credit. “I love that I can laugh at it and say, “I hate you for that”, but what I really mean is, “thanks for keeping my life interesting””.
Feb 15, 2024
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it feels very primitive. it makes me smile when I get covered in mud and am dodging obstacles without slowing down. in some ways, it’s even lighter on your joints because the ground is softer than concrete and you’re forced to take quicker, lighter steps ☝🏼. i highly recommend. also, when you finish, take your shoes and socks off and stick your feet in some mud. just embrace that you are an animal basically.
Mar 4, 2024