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Control your reaction. Re-assess your outlook. Compose your thoughts. Giving yourself a moment to think through whatever situation is in front of you can make a big difference and will let you be a calmer person overtime.
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a lot of the time we become so upset, sad, or disappointed in a person or situation that we don’t realize that we’re making it worse, for ourselves at least, by reacting in anger or gloom or resentment. these days, i often tend to ask myself if something is worth stressing over and then take it from there. if it is, i can evaluate my feelings accordingly and if its not, i can then focus on myself and direct my energy towards something that makes me feel good. that’s how i interpret “protect your peace”
Jan 29, 2025
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If there’s one thing I’ve learned from therapy it is to practice delay
If you feel the anxiety bubble up that’s prompting you to react, wait 10-15 minutes. If you feel the need to say something or make a decision, hit pause and wait it out. Sometimes I forget to delay but every time I remember to, I’m always glad I did.
Jan 18, 2025
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It's easy to get trapped in the intense emotions of those moments, and I'm sorry you're feeling that way. Try to distance yourself from the event as much as you can (don't take your work home, do something you enjoy after work, take a de-stressing nap, etc.) I've been in various support positions for over 10 years at this point, and you eventually start to get a thick skin for the irrational jerks out there, but here are some methods you can use to reframe things when it feels like too much:
- Think about the relative importance of the task at hand. So many things we get bogged down with in our day to day work is practically meaningless in the grand scheme of things. "We're not saving lives." is a phrase I hear quite a bit, so unless you actually are, it might help to think of how ridiculous it is for the person on the other end to get worked up over something not going as planned.
- Consider your worth as an individual in that moment. Just because your job is to help others doesn't mean it's not their job to treat you like a fellow human. I've had several managers over the years that have really stepped up in situations that escalated past the point of reason. Those moments helped me realize I should be advocating for myself more.
- Remember you're not responsible for other peoples' reactions. I have seen people start fuming over the most basic of obstacles, while others have approached fairly large problems with a completely calm, collected demeanor. Even if you were at fault for something that got messed up, an explosive reaction from the other side just exposes the type of person they are. It's not about you or your competence!
Hang in there, and I hope some of this helps
Aug 13, 2024
Top Recs from @harryboi
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Assume by default that people like you. Understand that people thinking and behaving differently is a beautiful display of how life shapes us. When in doubt, assume the best intentions of those around you because you would want the best assumed of yourself.
Apr 15, 2024
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It's cliche I know, but it really can make someone's day. If you do this enough, you could make an unlikely friend, and those can be the best kind. Specifically, because the friendship would be based purely on a chosen connection and not circumstance.
Apr 15, 2024
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Do the things that make you happy and take pride in being a part of communities of like-minded folks. It can really be anything, as long as it brings you fun and friends. What makes a hobby "real" is the connection to life that you find when doing it. Having a few hobbies that keep you active, connected, and creative will greatly improve your relationship with life.
Apr 15, 2024