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May 3, 2024
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I definitely feel like love can be transformative, but it's also on us to remember our boundaries and when enough is enough lmao
I'm also a bell hooks babe and it's also a part of her philosophy to go where ur wanted and loved by many
May 3, 2024
thewarblerette yeah it can feel like a hard line to walk, especially when we live in a culture where people no longer believe in others capabilities to be better, so believing in a love ethic is a subversive act and therefore sometimes feels like you’re unable to judge how best to wield it and where it’s power stops when you don’t have many examples around you to compare it to. at some point you have to ask yourself if you’re fully disrespecting your own humanity by believing in a person you can’t yet see.
May 3, 2024
whildeyscotch Exactly!! And (idk if u've read Communion by bell) I think what we all need to remember is that, like bell says, love is a intentional act first and foremost. I think at this point bc a lot of people are very damaged and fucked up for a number of reasons, u need to keep in mind that not a lot of people have empathy nowadays.
U need to find ur community that can foster the love that u want and desire, and know that ur deserving of. Surfing thru life looking for a person u think may not exist is not what u need to do, but believing that that person exists anyway bc they, too, have been transformed by love! Maybe not being loved by u but by being given love from someone else and they enter ur life
However, love also comes from the community that breeds love into u nonstop. It's an amalgamation of things. I'm only able to speak on this so clearly bc it's been a part of my life style before I even read bell (I'm a very big astrology lover and my chart is nothing but about the transformative power of love lmao).
May 3, 2024
whildeyscotch thanks 😭 I think I've just come to terms with the fact that I'm not even going to consider dating a man unless he is committed to being intentional about love and unpacking his traumas in an intentional and transformative way bc fuck that shit
May 3, 2024
thewarblerette the best mindset to have. i’ve seen the best minds of our generation (mine) accidentally start saying “I can fix him”
May 3, 2024
whildeyscotch baby may I ask what ur sign is?? 😭 (I wish this app had a DMs option LMAOOOOO) I don't think I've ever had the "I can fix him" I think I'm more of "I can wait for him to change and grow for me" and he never does, I get pissed and then I move on bc I love myself too much for that
May 3, 2024
thewarblerette capricorn sun aquarius moon gemini rising!! the i can fix him mindset is new and an overcompensation after a friend pointed out i cut and run at the first sign of trouble instead of dealing with it lol
May 3, 2024
whildeyscotch cutting and running (imo) isn't bad if u get a gut feeling that the man won't change LMAO but dealing with it is still a mature responsible as well
Also I'm a Gemini rising too!!! hey girl!!
May 3, 2024
