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rather than directly into their eyes. Learned this and so many other things from my amazing middle school speech teacher/speech club sponsor shoutout to Mrs. Grant š„ŗā¤š«¶
May 15, 2024
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Since I was a kid, Iāve never been able to consistently look at ppl in the eye during conversations.
You know when you say a word too many times that it starts losing its meaning and you donāt even know what youāre saying anymore? (re: semantic satiation)
The same thing happens to me with eye contact. If I stare at someone for too long, I start losing sense of their face because Iāve been too hyper focused on looking into their eyes. And if I get too caught up in maintaining eye contact, I risk potentially losing track of what the person was even saying to begin with; which generally just comes off as me being rude/inconsiderate of the other person in the convo.
Iāve definitely gotten better at maintaining better eye contact as Iāve gotten older, but itās still a struggle. I generally have to do a little dance with my own eyes and alternate between looking at different parts of a personās face (or occasionally look elsewhere/fidget with something for a couple of seconds between stares) so that Iām still ālookingā at them most of the time without appearing like Iām uninterested or risk losing focus on what theyāre saying.
Aug 8, 2024
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as an indication of connection and projection of confidence [note to self]
Jan 24, 2024
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why does everyone avoid eye contact? in my opinion, eyes are the doors to the soul. i genuinely love looking people in the eye when iām speaking to them, i think it makes the conversation more intresting and it makes me feel like they are paying attention when i'm talking. iāve also noticed that this is a habit people with great social skills adhere, and i really admire that. approximately most people iāve met usually try to abstain from eye contact, and unfortunately it makes them look insecure and uncertain in themselves.
thank you for listening to my yapšš
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Aug 15, 2024
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āLife shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.ā
ā AnaĆÆs Nin
This is uncharacteristically raw and personal, even for me, and pretty heavy! I know many of you have seen me posting through it and I feel safe to talk about it openly now that Iāve safely landed at the start of my new life. Itās honestly even a little bit embarrassing but I think itās important to share.
Iāve never publicly mentioned it on here, but I have a husband; as of Friday, weād have been together for 11 years, and weāve been married for 3 years as of 2/22. I realize now that I wanted to explore what I looked like outside of my relationship with him because I had lost that. This is why PI.FYI has been so meaningful to me as a space to express myself and connect with peopleāto rediscover my voice.
I had been living a lie this entire time, to others but worst of all to myself. Heās been verbally and emotionally abusive, physically but without touching me, to the point that every day I spent with him I was in danger. Iāve been shrinking myself and walking on eggshells to avoid making him insecure and provoking his casual put-downs and fits of rage, while hanging on for dear life to the threads of good I could see.
Iāve wanted so badly to leave, more than anything, but I felt like there was no way out and that this was just something I would need to endure indefinitelyābut someone who is so very dear to me helped me see that I have wings to fly, not by acting as my savior but by reminding me of my own power. The emotional safety they built and the gentle care they showed me made me feel like I could open up to them. With their encouragement I was brave enough to tell the truth to my friends, my family, my boss, and they have received me with warm, loving and open arms and rallied to support and protect me. The financial andĀ logistical aspects were the most intimidating to me and itās going to be tough for a while but Iām going to be better than okay!
Now Iām opening up to you. This isnāt the only abuse Iāve suffered in my life, and my old therapist told me she believed it was my mission to share my strength and light with others to inspire them and show them that change is possible.
I hope that by sharing this, I can reach even just one person who is going through something similar and show that they are not alone, and they are not weak. People with certain backgrounds may be more vulnerable to abuse, but it can happen to anyone. It thrives in darkness, shame, and isolationāand breaking that silence is the first step toward freedom.
Leaving is the scariest thing I have ever done but I have so many angels around me, and I am endlessly grateful. Thank you for being here with me š
23h ago
My dad teases me about how when I was a little kid, my favorite thing to do when I was on the landline phone with somebodyābe it a relative or one of my best friendsāwas to breathlessly describe the things that were in my bedroom so that they could have a mental picture of everything I loved and chose to surround myself with, and where I sat at that moment in time. Perfectly Imperfect reminds me of that so thanks for always listening and for sharing with me too š
Feb 23, 2025
Schedule sent my resignation email for the morning, effective immediately ā
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Feb 27, 2025