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Disclaimer: I’m feeling pissy & this is an opinion I dont fully take seriously cause ppl should do what they please as long as it doesn’t cause harm
~essentially a rant abt a pet peeve~
To me the act of smoking cigs if ur not already addicted to cigs is wildly goofy…
*the obvious :they’re addictive and a money pit
*the look: it can be painful watching someone bum a cig from me and A) puff at it/ theyre clearly in pain B) they light it and effectively let it burn away C) throwing half a cig on the ground
*vibe: I know one girl who will always ask to bum at parties which would be and recently she started buying her own SHE WILL NEVER SHARE W ME AND SHE DOESNT EVEN ACTUALLY SMOKE very much the kind of person who lights a cig just to take an aesthetic photo with their coffee or a cocktail and their brand new copy of The Prophet
May 24, 2024
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i’m sorry to my nicotine addicted friends, but you see the most gorgeous people out in public and then all of a sudden they start sucking on a fluorescent highlighter looking thing and now the whole place smells like tutti-fruiti.
this especially applies to men in suits and women who are dolled up, it just removes the elegance from their appearance.
(ik i’ll get hate for this, but the action of smoking i think just looks tacky—and drug use)
Feb 16, 2025
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I’m not trying to catch the big C but smoking will never not be in my life. Everything in moderation. A cig here and there is good for my mental health.
Vapes are cringe (but I’ll still ask for yours because I’m insufferable.)
Feb 3, 2024
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started buying my own cigs at the start of last year to get through a rough patch. it was me and my marlboro golds against the world back then. was too broke to afford to buy them super regularly so i'd have to ration over weeks. and luckily (not really) my friends also started smoking around the same time so i could bum off them if need be. i've been quitting since i properly started and i haven't bought a pack in a while now. moved onto strictly social smoking but i go out often enough it makes this a tad redundant. i don't desperately fiend for it as much, i could hardly finish the last one i had but god does a drunk cig feel good af.
also as someone who does biomed, your reminder and mine that smoking is really bad for you btw!!! we really need to invent smoking that isn't a health hazard.
Apr 9, 2024
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To start—> I don’t want this to come off as trauma dumpy, I am v happy with the person Ive grown into. Who I wouldn’t be if I didn’t have these experiences:)
I’ve moved around so so so much especially as a kid. I used to feel v guilty bc there were a lot of friends I left behind bc of circumstances beyond my control. This pattern became a trend that continued throughout my life. Went to 4 high schools; was going thru a lot, and was referred to as a ghost.
Having someone you didn’t even realize knew who u were say “omg! It’s been a year! We thought you’d died, wow, how are you? Yk a lot of people tried to reach out…etc” completely changed my perspective on the world. I didn’t even realize the possibility I was really noticed outside of my immediate friend group.
Another case happened this year at university. I was chatting w someone from a class, their friends walk up to say hi, and one says “your name is Sophia right?” I said yes and assumed I’d just met her while drunk at a show. So I apologized, and asked her name/ where she was from and all that jazz. It got more awkward when she said we went to the same school growing up, same class and everything. I didn’t recognize her at all, but obviously she knew me, it was so bizarre. Continued to see her around campus nearly every day for the rest of the year Lolz.
It didnt all actualize for me until recently, and still makes my head spin. I can’t imagine how many people I unintentionally became a ghost to :// being perceived is crazyyyy
May 24, 2024
In this regard, to what I like to call a funk.
I feel très dookie. Lots of change in my life, and in times of instability I tend to fall off the horse- in a major way. Like many ppl. This past go round I have been excessively hard on myself over my general lacking in… well almost everything. Ive come to the conclusion that there are times you have to give yourself more grace than you’d like to. Maybe the pity party can last a couple more days than usual. I won’t go into details, bc as those of you reading who have dealt with mental health struggles, it can be sort of gross. Sure. There’s a ton I could be doing to put an end to my funk. Make more of an effort to dig myself out of the hole. But, at the end of the day I know I will come out of the funk in my own time. Faking myself out, and convincing myself I’m feeling better serves no one.
Making yourself feel worse over feeling bad in the first place is just wildly counterproductive. Just keep moving forward in time. There’s a lot of it <3
Jun 2, 2024
May 29, 2024