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not only when you have a deep conversation or they do something great for you, remember that our reception of love is equal to our familiarity with giving it to others. unlearning the process of commodifying love has been so difficult but so freeing, realizing i can care for people openly for simply being in my lives without having to feel like they must do something to earn it is so so wonderful, highly recommend
Related Recs
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Looking back, the most meaningful moments of my life have been those where I‘ve felt closest to those I love- typically as a result of a shared experience or a vulnerable/honest conversation. If my time was running short, I think I would just put any awkwardness aside and tell people what they mean to me and how much I love them. Such conversations may also reverberate and inspire others to be more intentional in their relationships with the time they have left.
And to echo another rec, I think it’s important to first identify what is most important to you personally and then invest in that. Brene Brown’s values exercise might be a good place to start!
Jul 24, 2024
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Sometimes I get caught up chasing ideals of love. Growing up with immigrant parents in the US, I wished my parents showed me love the way my friends' parents did. My parents seemed cold in comparison to the affection I saw my friends receiving. I fell for best friends who did love me but never enough and never in the ways I wanted them to.
Nowadays I have grown to appreciate the ways in which my parents do show me love -- when they ask if I've eaten or when I dye my mom's hair as she peels me oranges. Friendship to me no longer needs to be tied up in such rigid binaries. It's not the label of a relationship I'm after but rather just the intimacy of knowing other people. I try not to focus so much on how I wish to be loved by other people and instead pay attention to all the different ways I am loved. Acting with a mindset of abundance rather than scarcity. And in that way, everything feels enough.
Disclaimer: Establishing boundaries is paramount. Love that is corrosive or manipulative is not love.
Feb 1, 2024
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Sorry to sound like some James Taylor song or the most trite dad ever.
Just do it.
You won't run out of "I love you's" if you do.
You might even get one back (but that shouldn't be the objective).
You receive the love that you put out there in the world.
So start with your inner circle. Family. Friends. Significant others. Co-workers (within the boundaries of appropriateness, let's not turn this into something creepy).
None of us do this enough but we'd be fools not to at least try. Right?
Aug 10, 2024
Top Recs from @mantis
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“what are they doing? who are they seeing? nobody? really?? what are they working on? where are they going? how are they spending their time?? do they even still exist??”
NOBODY KNOWS NICE TRY MWAHAHAHA I AM AN ENIGMA
Jul 6, 2024
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like really look at it for a minute. okay ur done? no ur not look at the tree for longer. then u feel your worries and problems melt away in comparison to the great tree that has been here for ??? years and u realize tree is the answer
Jun 18, 2024
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walking is such a healing activity when you don’t have to be anywhere, just one foot in front of the other until you feel good
Jun 18, 2024