I should preface this with saying that when I first met him I thought he was hot, but I was dating his roommate so it was off the table. And I did not really think of him in any way other than a friend for a long time
Until one day we were sitting in a circle with friends, he was across from me, wearing a white button down tucked into some jeans, chatting with our friend, and I found myself thinking I needed to go be on his lap.
Then sort of freaked out internally, and thus began months of moments like this coming up and me squashing them down until eventually I couldnāt ignore the fact that I liked him and now we are married.
Jul 14, 2024
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ok this is for my boyfriend and we were never friends technically since we met and started dating immediately but i was unsure of him in the beginning / thought he was cute and fun but no crush just yetā¦
but then he came to pick me up at the station near his house on what i guess was our 3rd date and he was walking down with his headphones on and his curly hair was bouncing up and down and he looked like he was on such a mission, with a very cute serious look on his face. Iām not sure why that was the moment but I felt like a sort of āpang!ā feeling and after that I was pretty much in love :)
Jul 15, 2024
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Guy 1: wore his long hair in a braid one day, danced just while goofing off and he somehow made it look super attractive (reader: he can barely dance), posted a photo of himself āsnowboardingā down a volcano during winter break, recruited me for his short film project that involved several takes at the end of my character hugging his character š (weāre married now)
Guy 2: wore a suit to a wedding (this man normally wore cargo shorts and tshirts heād probably owned for a decade, which thereās nothing wrong with it was just a particularly stark difference lol)
Guy 3: merely made silent eye contact a few moments longer than usual while smiling š«
Girl 1: longtime friend but hadnāt seen her face in a while due to long distance and her rarely posting pictures of herself anywhereāshe sent me some selfies and i was dazzled āØ
Girl 2: already thought she was beautiful and interesting but had a real āoh noā moment when her eyes lit up as she spoke passionately about her favorite Victorian novel (also when she recalledĀ exactly where an obscure quote from an academic journal had come from, inCLUDING the year of publication š¤Æ)
Jul 14, 2024
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i was raised in a highly religious household where i was taught that dating was for marriage. middle school romances, then, were frowned upon and seen as fickle because they ājust lead to unnecessary heartbreakā. as fucked up as this logic was, it made sense to me at the time and little me became an expert at suppressing any and all romantic urges, knowing that one day, when i was old enough, my time would come. brainwashing runs deep though, and this sense of being too young for a serious relationship never left me.
time passes, and one day i find myself at 18 years old sitting in the most romantic gazebo in a forest with this girl i felt i really liked at the time. i tell her how much i like her. she says she feels the same. my heart is pounding like never before. yet, terrified of commitment, feeling ashamed of having feelings, and having the sense that im going to have to marry this girl if things went any further, the moment came and went and we never kissed.
we end up moving away from each other. i spend my next years at college feeling heartbroken but also wracking my brain over why things never truly felt right with her. i do shrooms, my religiosity unravels, and i finally accept that im gay. internal crises ensue and i spend a good couple years ādoing they workā, as they say.
flash forward to 23. iāve moved to the city and have my own apartment. iāve just come out two months prior. i decide i want to start dating (big because i had never actually dated anyone, esp men). i meet someone online and we go out a few times. iām absolutely charmed and he tells me how bad he wants to kiss me but i have to decline because i still feel like i barely know him and i donāt want to regret it. i explain my lore to give reason for my apprehension. like, the stakes are now HIGH - my brain is way too developed at this point for me to waste my first kiss on just anyone.
one evening shortly after, weāre chatting on the couch in my apartment and that pre-kiss feeling is in the air. he asks again if he can kiss me and i say yes. he leans in, does the deed, i kiss back, and we make out for close to three hours (needed to make up for 23 years of nothing). one of the best nights of my life. it took years of self-work and un-conditioning to get to that place in my life where i could experience/enjoy a moment like that and im so proud of myself for it<3
epilogue: we continued to go out but ended up doing the whole anxious/avoidant situationship dance which nearly destroyed me in the end (i still think about him every day). but we had some good times lol
Oct 17, 2024
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This has become the norm and every day I grow more disturbed. I understand if somebody is behaving in a harmful way, that is good to document and put out there. But as a whole, it seems, we have become so comfortable with recording people just living their lives. I saw a video of a guy working and the caption of the video was that he was so hot, we needed to find him!!! Why are you providing the Internet with his face and location instead of just going up to talk to him? I saw another of two people on the subway, seemingly a couple, having a very emotional moment. How would you feel if you open up an app and saw a video like that of yourself? I donāt like this level of sibling society surveillance. Why are you videoing an elderly person with sad music dubbed over it to gain likes? It is WEIRD. Donāt even get me started on videos of children. It is WEIRD to use a stranger without their consent to get some kind of fake validation. Get a life.
I donāt mean to come on here and share something so negative, I just donāt have anywhere else to put it and itās gnawing at me.
Oct 7, 2024
Feb 23, 2025
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Iām curious what your brains are like
1d ago