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after 2 months smoke free i have decided i will treat myself tomorrow to another pack of cigarettes. all because a cute guy in my class said he had a smoke this morning b4 class, and since then all i can think about is having a cig. i lost the battle.
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my last “break up” was from a situationship with a guy who i would regularly stay up all night with, chain smoking and talking about every damn thing under the sun. i would often wake up the next day feeling swollen and raspy and like i was doing way too much of a “good” thing. i could never resist him or those damn cigs. when he broke things off unceremoniously, i decided to sever the attachment to my other unhealthy habit at the same time. i haven’t touched a cigarette since.
Mar 6, 2024
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i open my pack of cig and i luckily found just the one last cig in there… makes me EXTREMELY grateful to be alive. Life's GOOD.
Jul 16, 2024
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started buying my own cigs at the start of last year to get through a rough patch. it was me and my marlboro golds against the world back then. was too broke to afford to buy them super regularly so i'd have to ration over weeks. and luckily (not really) my friends also started smoking around the same time so i could bum off them if need be. i've been quitting since i properly started and i haven't bought a pack in a while now. moved onto strictly social smoking but i go out often enough it makes this a tad redundant. i don't desperately fiend for it as much, i could hardly finish the last one i had but god does a drunk cig feel good af.
also as someone who does biomed, your reminder and mine that smoking is really bad for you btw!!! we really need to invent smoking that isn't a health hazard.
Apr 9, 2024
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Anyways here’s the song of the day w special mentions:
Welcome to My Island (Remix)- Caroline Polachek
Our Day Will Come- Amy Winehouse
Aug 25, 2024
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It started off as a drunken ki, but now it’s been seven days and I can’t stop thinking about cigs and my fashion magazines.
NY will be the site of my ruin.
Aug 26, 2024
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Only got 5 hours of sleep and in that short period of time I had a numerous amount of nightmares…all in succession. Literally feel like I need to meditate or something to change the course of my fate…. bc that shet was crazy
Aug 25, 2024