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i just moved back in to my parents’ house, after spending 4 years of college outside of town.
gone was the feeling of liberty, of living my life as mine and only mine. suddenly, i forgot how i used to live under this roof for all of those years.
this place’s supposed to be my home. but moving back here doesn’t feel like coming home.
not anymore.
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im finally home after several months and theres this constant feeling that i need to go ‘home’ cz this doesnt feel like that at all. Im just reminded of why i left in the first place. if this makes sense.
Aug 1, 2024
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i was home for thanksgiving after moving away 10 years ago, and being home made me feel creepy and like a child again. so i wrote some creative nonfiction about the town i grew up in, personifying the city itself and writing stories about the town villainizing and holding hostage its residents. there's a huge government operation there as well so it lent itself to storytelling quite well
Dec 30, 2024
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something so comforting about waking up in the room you grew up in as a kid
it’s such a familiar yet distant view, like waking up to a past life - the posters, the books, the shelves lined with stuffed animals and random trinkets
Apr 20, 2024
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i have always known this. that people come and go. but it was only recently that this statement really… struck me. i guess that no matter how much you want people to stay in your life, sometimes it‘s just inevitable. though it was hard at first to let go of ‘your person’, i also realized that relationships are maintained by more than just one person.
so no matter how much you want to keep those people in your life, to save the relationship and connection that you have, at the end of the day, they also have a say in what they feel and what they want. and if what they want is to be out of your life, then the best thing that you could do is to accept and respect that.
it’s the best thing that you could do. not only for them, but also for you.
Dec 31, 2024
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nothing beats the aftermath feeling of hanging out with your homies that you haven’t seen for a long while, knowing that you had a well spent day with the right people.
my heart is full.
Jan 3, 2025
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just turned 23 today!
i feel like you always got these existential crisis in your early twenties. (or is that just me?)
but the number 23 is particularly such a strange age.
you feel confused about in which end of the spectrum that you fell in. you are no longer considered to be a teen, but you also don’t have much of a responsibility to be called an adult just yet. you’re an in-between.
i guess i can relate to when mark hoppus sang what’s my age again, which legit sums up the whole confusion in being the age of 23. of still feeling like you’re not an adult just yet, but also forced to act your age.
peter pan complex really does exist huh?
Jan 1, 2025