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i live in places that dont exist

Before I sleep I tend to imagine a future in which I meet the love of my life who just makes all the time I spent ”waiting” worth it. I fall asleep thinking on things that aren’t so out of reach still THEY ARE NOT HERE. Other times during the day I think about what has happened, all the things that have brought me to where I am. I just realized I’m never here! In the now, in the whatever is going on where I’m standing. I live in places that don’t exist with people that are not real! Yes in theory I might know them but in my head both in the memories and in my made up senarios they are not them. They are what I want them to be… they are an extension of me and what I think they should be. I think the now requires me to lose the control I have in my made up worlds, and that might be too scary for me now.

@mjthefirst

Feb 7, 2025

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sometimes it feels as fleshy as reality and thats a little scary

my dreams are always mega vivid. in terms of creating though it’s a bit frustrating because i don’t always feel great when the product doesn’t match the obsessively detailed vision. my brain does make the cool creative decision of having a little vignette filter situation going on when i daydream. i have a constantly bumbling, genderless internal monologue going at all times. it doesn’t exist to dictate my actions as a singular narrator. it may not even relate to what’s happening to me at the moment. just know it’s Always Going.

@deardoveswings

Feb 15, 2025

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Liminal-esque Rooms

I have two reoccurring dreams, both where I'm trapped in unless "rooms". In one of them I'm trapped in a white void filled with invisible objects that no matter how much I try, I cannot crush. I have woken up sick to my stomach a multitude of times from this. I remember oe specific instance was whenever I was having fever dreams in the back of my mom's car and was going in and out of consciousness, repeatedly having this dream over and over. It got to the point where I would repeatedly wake up screaming and sweating and ended up hurling in my mom's backseat. My second dream is a room that consists of a neverending wall of moving gears. I cannot move and can only listen and watch the gears operate. I've woken up in a cold sweat every time I've had this dream. I have no clue what that says about my psyche, but I'm choosing the path of "ignorance is bliss".

@skellitime

Feb 7, 2025

Top Recs from @dylanmesina

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RE-REC'D BY @dylanmesina

intentionally going to places you suspect your enemies are

enemies in this context meaning anything from hostile exes to political adversaries you live in your city. assert your right to the space. often times if you cut ties with a deeply maladjusted person you’ll find that you basically never see them around because if they’re maladjusted they’re probably also bad at regularly touching grass. in the rare case they do show up, just act casually. challenge the other guy to strike first by minding your own business. they never will, and if they do, they’re the ones who will look insane, not you. never let your fear of the past keep you from experiencing the present. ever.

@dotmatrices

Oct 14, 2024