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The fan girl loves what she loves without reservation, and to the fullest extent. It doesnât matter to her what the popular opinion is about her favorite band, she will scream every lyric to every song, and do so unabashedly.
The fan girl embodies courage in vulerability. Her enthusiasm is often ridiculed, yet she refuses to shrink. Being true to oneself is at the core of the fan girl, and there exists no self-masking for the purpose of social adhesion, no denying of oneâs passions, no second-guessing of the self.
be the fan girl.
be the first adopter of your passions.
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My favorite thing in getting to know new people is finding out the things they enjoy that seem a bit out of character. I think itâs comforting and a bit sexy when not everything that they like has to be âcoolâ for them to really enjoy it. Being self-assured and knowing your worth is hot.
After all, life is too short to try and shape yourself around a mould that doesnât truly resonate with you. Just enjoy the things that bring you joy without caring if they are basic or lame to others. you can enjoy the band that everyone hates, enjoy the movies that people think are overrated, and wear the shirt that went out of style 5 years ago.
true authenticity is a rare trait, always has been. Itâs like striking gold when you find that inner peace to just be yourself, regardless of how cringy others find it. Find the peace to like what you like without shame.
Feb 20, 2025
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Iâve been known to gas myself up. Iâll walk into a room and announce that I love my outfit for the day. Iâll show someone a spreadsheet that I made and say that Iâm in awe of my brain for having such a good idea and bringing it to fruition. And I can assure you that Iâm laughing at every single one of my jokes.
Itâs obvious how loving yourself and having confidence improves how you feel overall. We know this, we understand this. What I want to talk about is the lesser known impacts of believing in yourself, which is how the rest of the world interacts with you when you carry yourself with unshakable confidence.
On the surface, how do other people react when Iâm giving myself a gold star? They giggle, sometimes they may roll their eyes.
On a deeper level, when you truly walk through the world knowing that you are that bitch, it creates an inexplicable magnetism. People notice you in a different way. Take a compliment on an outfit, for example. I wear cute clothes, but so do a lot of people. When someone compliments my outfit, what they are often actually drawn to is that they can tell that EYE feel amazing wearing my outfit.
I love job interviews. People find this shocking and confusing, but theyâre going about interviews all wrong. Iâm not trying to sell myself, sound like I know what Iâm talking about, convince someone to hire me, none of this nonsense. Iâm excited to talk about my previous work and skills that Iâm so proud of and how amazing I am. I donât have to tell them how valuable I am, how lucky they would be to have me- the way I believe in myself conveys it.
As mother (RuPaul) says, âif you donât love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?â We always talk about treating other people in the way that you want to be treated, but that starts with you. Are you nice to yourself? Do you love yourself? Are you the only girl in the world? If you canât show up for yourself in these ways, itâs going to limit your capacity to show up for others.
We donât have to pretend like this is possible every moment of every day. Most days, it feels like everything in our environment is trying to tear us down constantly (especially women!) and sometimes its all too much. Sometimes you just wake up and itâs just not your day. These things happens. Good news- you can try again tomorrow.
Worried about being labeled as delusional? Youâre not- you are the baddest bitch in the room. Labeled as extra? Good. Take up as much space as you see fit. Vain? Thatâs fine. Some people canât see whatâs beyond the surface; the 700th selfie I put on IG has much less to do with liking my face and much more to do with feeling beautiful in my soul.
Itâs hard to put into words. But when you believe in yourself, people notice. They wonât be able to put their finger on it, thereâs just something about you that stands out. It comes through in our body language, our micro-behaviors, and the wavelengths and vibrations we canât see and feel.
Try it out. Lie to yourself until you believe it.
Then, watch the world start to fall at your feet.
Aug 27, 2024
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I'm of the mind that the fear of being corny or cringe will eventually lead to excessive uniformity and a general aversion to risk taking. Like "such and such is so cringe" so it's probably safer to do nothing instead.
This is impossible to say without mad clichĂŠs and platitudes but let me try to cook for a second.
I think that detaching yourself from the thoughts of others is very freeing. None of our decisions are made in a vacuum and weâre all going to be influenced by something, but redirecting your thought process back towards "what do EYE like/enjoy?â and away from "what do other people THINK about the things I like/enjoy?" has become a healthy reset for me.
Iâve also been thinking about the amount of art weâve probably lost out on because someone internalized or felt discouraged by a negative reaction to something that shares a similar vision or concept. I feel that dislike is a guarantee with everything. Itâs very easy to do and itâs bonding (I do it all the time) but it also helps me realize that there are always going to be things that someone hates and letting that stop you from doing things that bring you joy, will inevitably kill your spirit.
I canât imagine a world where Viola Davis didnât cry until she was covered in snot and out of breath, or where Jim Carrey didnât act with his entire body, or where Madonna never rolled around on stage in a wedding dress. A lot of those choices came from doing what other people at the time wouldnât do. Behaviors that people believed were worthy of contempt.
Thinking about how if Joni Mitchell didnât write Blue, Fiona might not have written When The Pawn, and SZA might not have written Ctrl, or what would happen if any of them fell into the belief that honesty and vulnerability were cringeworthy acts or something you should run from.
People respect a full SEND. If thereâs a question of whether or not you should send, choose a full send EVERYTIME. None of these people were praised for their vanity or willingness to be reserved, they were praised for the exact opposite.
Feb 28, 2024
Top Recs from @mikefish
The nickelodeon games website was my go-to way to escape the monotony of my childhood. This game was the closest the website had to a complete game and was lots of fun
Jan 17, 2025
Naked Eyes- 80âs English synth-pop/new wave. Youâre probably familiar with atleast a few of their songs âAlways something there to remind me,â or âPromises, Promises,â but a lot of the rest of their discography is just as great! âWhen the lights go out,â and âVoices in my headâ are two of my favorites. Itâs kind-of on the borderline of what I might define as rock, so oops if it isnât what youâre looking for.
The Stone Roses- 80âs-90âs English Alt/Indie Rock. A bit of a short discography, especially for how influential the roses were in the rock scene. Their debut album is all you really need to get started with their music, and it does not disappoint! Some of my favorites are âI wanna be adored,â âWaterfall,â and âShoot you down.â Although the entire album is one of my favorites and most definitely worth a full listen.
Siouxie and the Banshees- 70âs-90âs English Post-punk, Alt-rock. Unlike the stone roses, Siouxie has a diverse discography, with bangers scattered throughout the albums. âSpellbound,â and âCities in the dust,â are must-listens, but thereâs gold to be found in the songs without as much critical acclaim. My favorites include âHappy house,â and âThe passenger.â
Jan 17, 2025