i love asking about things i think about a lot and feel like also help u negotiate values between two people
- do u believe in a higher power?
- if u were a fish what fish would u be?
- kill, fuck, marry indigenous animals of yr local area
- what do u do for fun? (as opposed to what do u do for work)
- do u have a fav legend/ cryptid?
- songs u want at yr funeral?
- do u wanna kiss me? ;)
Jan 22, 2025
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When I list the things that are off bounds for a first time interaction, I then realize the sheer amount of things that are in bounds! I sort of have 3 big no-no's for first time convos, and you can decide for yourself if these feel right for you:
- party politics [I leave other kinds of politics in as fair game: class warfare or the rise of fascism or the opportunity for anarchic community building, etc.]
- religion
- personal finances
there are probably others, but those are the big 3 imo.
from there, I like to ask lots of how questions:
- how did you feel when you discovered your latest favorite song? can you pinpoint why it made you feel that way?
- how did you meet the host?
- how did you get into that hobby/line of work/subculture?
- how do you find joy/inspiration/motivation in your daily life?
- how do you like to dance?
- how good is this coors/pabst/french onion dip/potato chip/music/etc?
- how long has it been since your last speeding ticket?
- how long do you think you could last without eating a potato?
etc.
you could also ask any of the fun questions that perfectlyimperfect asks:
- fave things to put on toast
- your go-to email signature
- unique staple in your fridge
BUT TRULY!!! spencerto is right: don't over do it!
Jul 20, 2024
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This is, I think, the best question I’ve been asked on a date— it lets me answer as superficially or as deeply as I’m comfortable, and it feels better/more sincere than a compliment. Early into a date compliments always feel really superficial, and this is a way to actually ask what someone likes about themselves, instead of telling them what you like about them.
Feb 21, 2024
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my brain doesn’t bookmark questions like that, so I would have to reference a list or something.
most of my questions are centered around asking people to expand on things that are brought up in live discussion, creating a space for them to be vulnerable and share deep shit with me, etc.
Jul 26, 2024
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nice nice nice nice!!!!!!
Dec 1, 2024
i read this book right after leaving an abusive relationship, trying to figure out what love was for me and how i could see it in my recently shook up world.
bell hooks writes in a simple, honest language. it’s a beautiful, accessible book that humbled me and taught me how to love people and where find the love i desired.
Feb 20, 2025