Everything above 100% is true btw^
All things considered I think I have a pretty normal interior landscape. Songs get stuck in my head. I daydream & I fantasize & I ruminate & I contemplate. Sometimes my mind is busy, sometimes it is totally quiet. Memory is something that constantly fails me-- it's closer to propaganda than documentary to me. And the projectionist who plays the propaganda to me is this blind, deaf, volatile schizophrenic intent on making me, the rememberer, as deluded & ill informed as possible. Sometimes I'll have this strange feeling that I've received a memory from the future in a dream, even more rarely I'll get this sort of memory in the waking world. To understand what I'm talking about, click the link I've supplied.
But really, honestly, outside of that I like to daydream a lot. Today I was thinking about visiting Georgia & daydreaming about being a young Russian nobleman in the 19th century, the son of some diplomat or something, laid out in some Tblisi opium den. I'm faded as fuck & I'm staring at the rug and the ceiling & then rolling over facedown in the naked breasts of some Georgian woman. She is perfumed & her arms are fat & she pets my hair and coos-- this is incredibly disgusting to me of course.
Sometimes I think that Consciousness is a curse. Free will was given to us by God, but Knowledge of Good & Evil was something that we were tricked into taking up by the serpent (ouroboros). Not a coincidence that all great sages exhort those who seek wisdom to cease with their perception & their perception of perception & their perception of perception of perception. Meta-cognition is the flattened out ourobouros (serpent) that traps the thinker in Hell.
