this may just be my reality, but when i don’t take my medication, i am only motivated when there are huge consequences (i.e. i have to work). When i take my meds, i can do anything i set my mind to…
Outside of that, having premade lists makes things a lot easier. And when i don't take my meds, the lowest stakes tasks are usually what feels comfortable to tackle.
Feb 9, 2025
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also beat me to recommending meds + good systems for task management! i've been out of 'em for a couple weeks and i'm back to pre-diagnosis levels of malaise and paralysis
these were exactly the recommendations i was gonna give!! also trying to do stuff with/around others, ie when i was a student, i was generally more productive in the library than in my dorm
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Real talk? ADHD meds work great but obviously not always what suits the situation best. What works best for me is making lists, setting timers and going with the flow. Kinda depends on what flavour of ADHD you have but with me I noticed that my executive functioning improved once I stopped trying to force it and started making the most of the productive energy bursts I felt. Not a perfect method though and meds were definitely easier.
Sep 16, 2024
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i usually start with ordering delivery food. that way i don't need to cook and i also need to get out of bed to take it from the courier.
in the waiting time i take a quick shower, brush my teeth and thinking about what tasks and deadlines i have at the moment and which of them are more important.
then i have breakfast and put something on the background to watch, usually it is "The Big Bang Theory" or "Brooklyn 99". I've watched them a million times so i won't be deeply interested but i also have something that kills the silence and don't make me go back into my head. I also take my meds and mark this in my tracker
Then i open my work tools, starting with Notion and Figma. I'm planning the day, all tasks that have to be done on laptop and another that require to go outside. If i can't make myself do any work, i turn on Britney Spears — Work Bitch. It usually helps but if i still can't do work, I'm doing anything else. I'm finding references for projects, planning the rest of the week, sending CV to different positions, all that kind of stuff. Or if i have time, i put on some nice clothes and go to work outside at the cafe or library.
In the evening i have supper, clean up the mess i little bit and go to bed.
The trick is to do everything like a robot, just get into routine with the empty head. It always helps me to get things done
Aug 24, 2024
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Ok essay incoming but I’m the same way and this advice is assuming that you have tried various ways to remind yourself of things (physical notes, reminders, alarms, schedules, to-do lists, whiteboards, etc) and struggled to respond consistently to this kind of stimuli. If you’re not already reminder-maxxing I recommend seeking out the most effective method for you to be unable to ignore the reminders. Might have to change over time as you become desensitized to one kind.
Once you’re seeing the reminders daily, the struggle is then acting on them. Seems obvious but sometimes when I’m struggling to complete a task or to do it regularly/form a routine, it helps to zoom in on my reasons for wanting to do it at all. Sure, running every day will make me burn fat and improve my cardiovascular health etc etc etc but sometimes for me with my neurodivergence those long term goals are too lofty and too postponable. Instead it really helps me to think about what kind of immediate reward I will get for completing a task or repeating a task—sometimes the immediate reward is just an immediate reward (“if I go for a 15 min run I’ll feel endorphin release ”) and sometimes it’s the removal of a punishing factor (“if I go for a 15 min run I’ll avoid the shame and anxiety of not doing the thing I said I was going to do today”. there’s a term for this in operant conditioning but I forget what it is). This is why for the really important stuff, I opt for a loud annoying alarm because one can only handle so much snoozing or postponing before it becomes easier to just do the thing.
Another piece of advice would be to harness the initial anxiety that a reminder prompts and act on it as quickly as possible, before the anxiety turns from motivating to crippling and before you can think of excuses/justifications for avoiding rather than acting.
I hope this helps! I’m far from perfect with this stuff and always having to adapt to my own ability to fall back but this has been the most consistently useful approach for me.
Nov 8, 2024
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Feb 10, 2025
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As a child growing up with brothers and as the fat black kid, i never considered myself feminine. Even when i lost weight in middle school and went to an all girls high school, looking girly or being more “feminine” was just not something i thought about.
I feel like recently, i wanted to explore that more, as this pull to dress and appear more feminine has become super strong. Having a house to decorate in any way I can, actually starting to feel better about my body to wear skirts again, etc has really influenced me. But my fears are that it may portray trad wife or child’s play; I’m nervous of stares or being questioned about my views if i were to give such a strong appearance of a girly woman.
But some of my inspirations have been strolling through vintage creators and small japanese insta accounts with super pink and fluffy aesthetics.
Hopefully i will build up the courage
Jan 5, 2025
1d ago