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im gonna ramble for a second. i have a real distaste for dating apps, but despite this i still don’t delete them. a small part of me thinks it’ll work out in my favor one day. but shoutout the loyal storylikers i’ve gained from failed hinge talking stages hahaha… i have a very loose definition of ‘type’ in terms of physicality, and even then someone physicality is never a deal breaker. usually. i don’t think i am meant to meet people this way. and i think a lot of people also say this so i am not original in this feeling, but i think i need to fall in love with a friend, someone that there is already a baseline compatibility with, a mutual appreciation already there. all the fanfic i read as a kid was a friends to lovers trope! and i think it works for a reason. that being said its scary to become friends with someone and then think your feelings are further than platonic, because now its hard to decipher between what could be deliberately flirty or just like. your standard hang ykno? i still have never successfully deciphered this so i don’t wanna stand on my soapbox and act like i have any real expertise. just thinking out loud. i’ve been kinda lonely recently and everyone around me has been getting into relationships, this venus retrograde is no joke haha. and the added nuance to the lesbian dating experience, ive been feeling more isolated than usual. sorry this one’s a bummer a little!!! maybe i should stick to album / song reviews
2d ago
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I know what you mean! It’s weird for me to immediately start with a date without knowing the person at all. Even if we say we’re meeting as “just friends” it just feels off. It’s tough for sure
Related Recs
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I linked a rec I made over a year ago about deleting hinge and dating the old fashioned way. have I been on a single date since then? nope. do I stand by what I said? absolutely.
I’m still convinced that the apps aren’t perfect, and while they might work for some people they’re kind of a necessary evil at best. without them, it’s hard to put yourself in contexts where meeting someone organically is possible. and even then, within those contexts the meeting has to be just that: organic. it takes time. it takes being in places/situations regularly where you think you’ll meet people who share your interests/values. it also takes a bit of effort to initiate those interactions, and also fate that someone might initiate something with you.
the apps are a convenient, quick fix, instant gratification solution to the issue in that they will get you dates, but in exchange for quantity you may sacrifice on quality. things of quality have no fear of time, though. waiting to encounter someone who is a good fit and in a good phase of life to be what you need and vice versa is going to take time. and if you work a 9-5 like I do, you’re going to have to invest in putting yourself in situations to meet people in your free time. or just do what I do and develop crushes on your superiors in the workplace that are doomed to never be realized because of HR protocol. i’d advise against the latter, though.
2d ago
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downloaded dating apps again after being asked for the millionth time why i'm not seeing anyone right now ... created my profile, swiped, and deleted everything within 24 hours .. again. why is everyone in such a rush to find that kind of connection? if i want a date night i'll call my friends. if i want mind-blowing physical satisfaction i'll put on a cate blanchett movie and do it myself. i just ordered a bundle of my favorite (terrible) (perfect) 1970s gothic romance novels to fufill my romantic dialogue needs... anywayssss have been feeling very content with my little life thank you to this piece (linked!!!) for validating all kinds of intimacy not just 'the one'
Feb 21, 2024
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I used to go in looking to fall in love. This ended quite poorly. I might’ve also been a love addict, separate issue from apps really. But anyways, now it’s meeting new people and getting out of my routine. Went rock climbing with a lovely and kind person tonight, ate tacos and had great conversation. So I wouldn’t have done that without hinge. Especially rock climbing. Turns out rock climbing is actually really fun. I think luddites and boomers might be on to something with the slow burn, courtship, long crushing and pining when it comes to love. Don’t know if the apps are conducive to that. Should say im a pretty bad person to take dating advice from. But yea keeping it low stakes and getting to know people is sick, can’t hurt yea ? *sub rec*: rock climbing. Great full body workout, challenges the mind a bit as well.
Feb 26, 2025
Top Recs from @shoegazer55
Not sure why but it has just been a great album to be doing my homework to. I've been using my CD copy for the last few days, and when I finish it I end up just looping it back again. Just a classic, never gets old.
6d ago
03/05/2025
it’s already march! that’s crazy! and i’ve been having a pretty shitty 10 days. time has been moving far too quickly. and recently i’ve been having this ache in my heart… yearning, if you will. for what? i don’t know exactly. a lot of it is probably intimacy, touch, love, the usual. but i also yearn for my room to stay organized, for my fingers to move across the frets of my bass quicker and in a way that sounds good, and i yearn for a lot of people, professors, peers, customers at my barista job, to be nicer. lots of stuff in my mind palace the last few days. so i made a mix compiled with songs i considered fitting for the theme of yearning. i also discussed yearning in relation to lesbian stereotypes. for queer women generally, but i prefer to speak on the experiences i know first-hand. and it’s cloudy today, just a little bit of misery for everyone’s mid-day listening session.
PLAYLIST:
1. Are You Kissing Anyone? - Saturday Looks Good To Me
2. Not Like I Was Doing Anything - The Cat’s Miaow
3. Love on the Dole - Moose
4. When You Sleep - My Bloody Valentine
5. Make You Smile - Dear Nora
6. Little Trouble Girl - Sonic Youth, Kim Deal
7. A Teenager in Love - The Pains Of Being Pure At Heart
8. Bran-new love song - the pillows
9. Go West - Liz Phair
10. Obscured - The Smashing Pumpkins
11. I‘m In Love With A Girl Who Doesn’t Know I Exist - Another Sunny Day
12. How Long Can This Go On? - Kitty Craft
13. Nymphs Finding the Head of Orpheus - Nicole Dollanganger
14. By Tomorrow - Black Tambourine
15. Sounds Like Suzie - Alison’s Halo
(bonus tracks that i didn’t play on air because i ran out of time T_T)
16. Madeline - Yo La Tengo
17. Goodbye Girls - Broadcast
18. You Make Me Happy In My Sorrow - Rocketship
19. I used to hate myself - Kang aru
☆*:.｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆
finally up to date on show lists, sorry for spamming
Mar 5, 2025
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hello!!!!
im nora, a lot of people know me as nori, and i wanted to start blogging again as a hobby so i thought this could be a cool platform to try out… i enjoy music, live shows, radio, art, and a lot of other things… and i plan to talk about all of it :)
this will also serve as a spot for me to log mixes from my semester-long radio show ‘in your orbit’ and perhaps i’ll post some of my printmaking work here too, maybe talk about it. trying to keep a really relaxed approach to blogging, because it’s supposed to be fun!
thanks for reading <3
Mar 5, 2025