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first night of a long weekend of solo travel and i have provisioned for success. instead of spending too much money on dinner, i am enjoying my spicy cup of noodles in bed at the hotel. i used the little coffee machine to fill it with hot water and am using two wooden coffee stirrers as chopsticks because i didnât pack a utensil. i cannot express the extent to which this small act feels like a triumphant return to myself. i love moments where something important is missing yet i feel so sure that i have everything i need.
Mar 16, 2024
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even though it takes effort and planning, iâm trying to see it as an act of love for my future self, like packing a kidâs lunch. my roommate even brings juice boxes to work so i started doing that too. itâs a simple task that makes my busy schedule so much easier and gives me something to look forward to each work day
Mar 11, 2024
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sometimes it is me myself and this bowl of pasta i made on a Friday night and that is a ok
Aug 31, 2024
i just made the most delightful scrumptious dinner. get this - asiago bagel, toasted, duh. cream cheese. gingerly, delicately placed spinach, and then smoked salmon on top, sprinkled with pepper. the whole process of making my meal, i was mindful, i was excited about it, i took my time. and you know what - i tasted the love. i can tell it was made with the purpose of nourishing my body, being delicious, and being love-filled, obviously. thank you, me :')
Aug 19, 2024
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felt the same way, was sick of it. got a flip phone i could slip my sim card into, activated it. first two weeks i was kind of itching for the smartphone and the little dopamine hits. after a while things started changing. i started reading for fun again, my attention span improved significantly, i carried a little journal everywhere to jot down my thoughts. in every room where everyone was on their phones, i felt like i was the only person actually present, paying attention. i found so many beautiful ways to fill the time. strangers praised me for my bravery lol. when i had to drive or go somewhere i didnât know how to get to i would write down the directions on a post it note and carry it or stick it to the dashboard. you will literally feel smarter for relying on your brain to figure things like this out instead of being on autopilot all the time. you can carry your smartphone around to use as an ipod/pocket camera and in an emergency it will still work on wifi. i asked friends to look things up for me (business hours, weather, traffic, phone numbers) when i was out and about. if people texted me id tell them to call me if they wanted to talk. it was a great decision that only ended bc i did an extended trip abroad where i needed my phone to get by, but i am going to go back to the flip again soon. i highly recommend! nothing compares to flipping a phone shut to hang up a call. it taught me how to enjoy true solitude again. do it!!!
Feb 27, 2024
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after being raised in a context where you were taught to be hard on yourself, leaning into self-compassion as a way of life in adulthood is truly powerful. hold yourself accountable and give yourself grace when you flounder, both are needed.
Mar 3, 2024
âwow i am in so much pain, i feel so ALIVEâ
âi am grateful to know that i have loved, truly lovedâ
âmay i never grow too guarded to feel into the depths of my soulâ
âall my favorite artists have felt this feeling, i am bound by heartbreak to my fellow humansâ
âthis grief is a process of me returning to myselfâ
if all else fails, watch the clip from call me by your name where the dad talks to his son about heartbreak (linked)
keep a journal, be patient, show yourself as much compassion as you possibly can
Mar 16, 2024