as much as you can - allow yourself to feel the pain. don’t judge yourself for however you’re feeling. keep busy and devote time to yourself but forgive if sometimes you still gotta stay in and sob. build up a beautiful life while grieving at the same time - and eventually you will realize you’re now as fully engaged with joy, pleasure, & passion as you once were with heartbreak !!!
Mar 16, 2024
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I like to remember that time is on your side, it will get easier as time goes by just for nature of it. So focusing on going through the day-to-day the best you can while being kind to yourself and letting the days past is what helped me.
It’s not easy, you have to go through the grief to come up on the other side.
But stick with the things that make your present more bearable and you WILL come up on the other side.
For me it was doing things for myself: listening to music, visiting close friends, cooking for myself, going on walks on nature, spending time alone and bored and finding new things I liked and enjoying my own company was life changing.
The loneliness is rough but it can be a great teacher (at least I like to think something had to come out of all that pain).
I guess it really depends on the break up the narratives you are telling yourself right now, but if you can be mindful about them, observe them, and let go of trying to understand and control everything they get less cruel. Right now you just need to survive and receive some kindness, later on you can build the story around it (Without the fog of the pain around it).
And for the love of god cut contact with them, their family and friends, at least for a while. rebuild yourself outside their zone of influence. Show vulnerability if you can, it can bring great support and lending ears, BE KIND TO YOURSELF (although have in mind sometimes over indulgence is not kind).
You will get through it, time is on your side.
Apr 18, 2024
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The best way is to just accept your grieving process. Accept that you are feeling things and accept your reactions to those feelings. that's extremely hard, i know. You probably just want to distract yourself instead of dealing with the elephant in your brain. But being upfront with yourself and your feelings really helps.
Maybe, instead of longing the past, celebrate it. Instead of bringing yourself down because you don't have them anymore, remind yourself of how lucky you are to have had that person in your life.
Aug 19, 2024
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Feel your feelings without judgment. Spend as much time with people who love you as possible. Make a list of things that bring you happiness/peace/comfort and try to do them.
Above all, be exceptionally kind, gentle, and compassionate with yourself. Remember that you won’t feel this way forever. There is a beautiful future ahead. You’re on your way 🫡
Oct 6, 2024
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Mar 12, 2024
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international women’s day this year was for solidarity with women in gaza, & with all palestinians. it’s not too late to start educating yourself, showing up to protests, joining orgs, looking into direct action! also would recommend lewis’ ‘abolish the family’ on a different but related note
Mar 11, 2024
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finished ‘within a budding grove’ :) in search of lost time continues to be the richest most pleasurable reading experience & the last two sentences of this volume blew me away. so excited to continue marking the time of my own life with the novel
Jan 29, 2024