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i love my birthday

one of the most memorable birthdays i have had is a surprise birthday for my 18th or 21st and i absolutely hated it. i appreciated the effort my family went through to do it but it was my literal nightmare. my birthday tradition is to spend it doing whatever i want and not feel bad about it. if that means spending an obscene amount of money on shoes i've been lusting after, heck yeah i'll do it. if that means spending the entire day at the cinemas, you bet i'm there. if that means going out with my friends or travelling, yeah i'm doing it. and sometimes i actually just don't feel like doing anything at all and that is sometimes a vibe too. i think sometimes we are put under pressure to celebrate our birthdays in a certain way with others or throw parties but if that isn't authentic to you or you just don't feel like it, your birthday should be the one day of the year that you can do whatever you want.

@theeyah

Jan 8, 2025

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becoming a birthday person

manifesto forthcoming. i hear time and time again - “i’m not a birthday person.” as a convert, i’m here to challenge that limiting belief. not unlike new year‘s eve, getting your hopes up for a single night is futile. thus, i have the following advice: -embrace birthday week    month is a little much, even for me, but allow the week to be birthday-centric. this doesn’t have to be sunday to sunday; it can  consist of any of the surrounding days that feel relevant to THE day -multiple experiences   much like new year’s eve, hanging your hat on one night is doomed. thus, i recommend that you implement ALL (not some) of the following: INTIMATE DINNER +with partner, family, a couple of friends. something that feels low key and non stressful. great for a thursday or sunday night. let them know ahead of time (if they need reminding) that you would like a candle of some sort on a house dessert (is this too bossy?? NO! you’d do the same for the ones you love. next). (i also get desserts with candles the whole month, unabashedly. and do the same for loved ones.) SOLO DAY +plan things for yourself: solo lunch, matinee, massage. buy a fancy latte. take a cab. spare no expense; today you turn off the switch in your head that wonders if it’s worth it because it is. FRIEND DAY +have people over, meet at a bar, or throw a full on party. this is group time. i honestly recommend doing this one last. you’ll likely have enough fun with the other two events that this will feel like a cherry on top. ask your type A friend to help plan, if you need help, and remind them again ab some sort of treat w canes. this doesn’t have to be a blowout! tell everyone to bring whomever, +1s, enemies as it’s more-the-merrier vibes. tl;dr everyone deserves to be celebrated and there are people in your life eager to help you make it happen. ask for what you want. do the same for them down the line ❤️ ps my birthday is 3/17 if you need to start preparing pps bonus tip - pic is of last year’s birthday outfit. i also like to throw a very easy mini theme to get people thinking ahead of time (i said to wear silk, leather, or mesh. everybody looked hot) ppps i have so much more to say ab this, lmk if you want more 

@cameron

Feb 3, 2024

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Make a list of your fave things and make a plan around that :)

I don’t tend to like celebrating my birthday with a group of friends and family (I haven’t since I was 12 and I’m 28 now) - it’s too much pressure. I always try to celebrate by curating a day (or two) filled with all the things I love and bring me joy. For example, this year, I went to my favourite bookshop and stocked up on some books, then went to the Lego shop and created a mini figure, then I went bowling, and to my fave Japanese restaurant in the evening :)

@moonchild

Aug 4, 2024

Top Recs from @alaiyo

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Using the word “gauche” instead of “cringe”

it’s so them-coded

@alaiyo

Mar 23, 2024

5

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Hummus

when i tell you the first sixty seconds of this video changed my life i need you to believe me. 10/10 strongly recommend especially amidst boycotting for palestine

@alaiyo

Mar 21, 2024

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How to do nothing by Jenny Odell

a treatise on the attention economy - checked it out on libby and got through it over the course of a work day, a lot of really interesting social and cultural explorations about how time itself is the final frontier of hypercapitalism and what decommodification of our attention and time should look like the book starts with a story about the oldest redwood tree in oakland and how the only reason it’s still standing is bc it’s unmillable, and how being uncommercializable is essential to our survival. it ends with an exploration of alt social media platforms (mostly p2p ones) and what keeping the good parts of the social internet and rejecting the bad ones should look like all in all a super valuable read; my only nitpick with the book is that odell isn’t just charting the attention economy but also attempting to “solve” it and relate it back to broader concepts about labor and social organizing, but her background is in the arts which leads to some really wonderful references to drive the points home while also missing some critical racial + socioeconomic analyses that one would expect (or at least really appreciate) from the book she promises to deliver in the introduction. but this does also make the book easier to read which is good because everyone should definitely engage with what she has to say will definitely be revisiting

@alaiyo

Mar 25, 2024