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i know im annoying obsessed with my inner morals. it can get in the way of play that some friends may want to engage in, but ultimately the closest friends r ppl who find play more pleasurable with me because it doesn't compromise our humanity we r building. it doesnt have to be serious when everything is serious if you are surrounded by people that make you into a better you.... aka don't get so mad at yourself for "not fitting in" for something that feels weird to you. You are you and meant to connect w individuals, Not friendgroups. "find your people, not your community"
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People are so different and diverse. And what is cultured and tapped in to one group is going to be irrelevant to another.
You'll be the most happy and free if you are able to resist all of those pressures toward grouplike and alignment. The pressures will be lifelong, though often with a different flavor than right now.
Although the safe thing is to get into that rudderless ship of alikeness with everyone else, the better thing is to love what you love, no apologies, with joy and passion. After a time, they'll come to you.
Feb 11, 2025
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i often find myself wanting to be universally liked before i remember that actually, not only are there certain kinds of people that i donât care about the opinions of, there are certain kinds of people who i actually *want* to dislike and resent me and i would be deeply uncomfortable being admired by.
when youâre expressing a part of yourself that youâre afraid might make people dislike you, consider: what is the sort of person who would dislike me because of this? would i want to associate with that kind of person? very occasionally the answer might be yes, but often youâll find that as soon as you concretely imagine the sort of person who is alienated by you (or unconventional trait X), you will find that itâs the sort of person you donât want to associate with anyways!
âbe yourselfâ is not just good advice because itâs personally comforting - itâs also good advice because being yourself is a good way to filter out people from your life who arenât ready for what youâre bringing to the table. stop thinking âdo they wanna hang out with meâ and start thinking âdo i wanna hang out with themâ
Oct 10, 2024
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talk a little too much and a little too loud. laugh for too long or too hard. donât worry so much about how everyoneâs perceiving you, stop preforming for an imaginary audience, not every interaction needs to be dissected. itâs okay to not always be defensive, tell people you love them, throw all your cards out on the table once in a while - the stakes arenât always that high.
remembering to get outside of my own silly head and actually live is hard sometimes.
Apr 16, 2024
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Can't reccomend this enough
Dec 27, 2023
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if you cant get yourself to put your phone away quite yet, just get yourself to look at the room behind your phone, or the real world, as a constant practice. its like when the screen used to go black between eisodes of netflix loading. a reality check. it feels good, i promise. foreground the bavkground, even for a moment. be kind to yourself
May 24, 2024
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much more effective, much more confusing, much more true
Jan 22, 2024