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i feel like a massive hypocrite writing this, but im gonna be honest.. the past year i've been constantly listening to/watching youtube videos and ig reels in order to fill the silence. just loads and loads of useless information and empty talks. last night i realized that doing so has been keeping me from thinking about stuff, listening to music and in general, being productive. i was filling my head with useless noise so i wouldn't think. it ended up being a comfortable bubble of bullshit that was hard to break out of. today i stopped the video, grabbed my notes of things i want to DO and played some music in the background. felt much better. i might relapse— i have many times, but im tired of being a vertically scrolling thumb (again).
Aug 16, 2024

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I tend to think like this and start to spiral. It's so easy to believe it's in your best interests to ruminate about these things bc they're factual and out of your control. Rewiring your brain takes time but I found this youtube vid that made me forget about all my external anxiety and feel hopeful for the next couple hours. (I went into this thinking it would be dumb and do nothing but waste my time)
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or, if you have too much attachment, just really try to open them. turn nofs off and you can ween off to start, but I promise when you go to check ur socials to make sure you didn’t miss anything, you will realize you never do, there isn’t anything to miss. In the meantime, pick up a book! I have recs if you want (I stay far away from booktok books). Get a sketch book and draw, try embroidery (it’s easier than you think, I made a little frog and put it on a shirt), start reading the news, do crossword puzzles, clean your room, go for a walk, a drive, call a friend and my personal fave, get a cheap comp notebook and start writing. I realized I had trouble keeping a journal because I would put too much pressure on it and also bought notebooks that were too pretty and delicate.
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i used to ride my bicycle/take public transport all the time, but walking is really good actually! it slows down the wildness of modern life, shows you small things you would otherwise drive past. its all around a good idea if you have time to spare of course. great for calming down, thinking, good for relieving stress, good for meeting new people
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