Related Recs

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Texing back

We don’t write letters anymore so I think that texting is the closest we have to regular written communication (which I actually value and enjoy in moderation).  I see and feel the downsides to texting too much. And I have done a lot of work on responding to people slower and taking more thought and time into it. With this said, I have noticed that many of my friends will initiate conversations with me only to never respond.    I think the ways you communicate can be important examples of how you’re considering your loved ones. 

@valoorie

Nov 21, 2024

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text messages are overwhelming

i am flattered that my friends want to talk to me, but it’s a stimulation overload. like, my attention is being demanded at any time of the day without consent. the messages pile up, people sending me memes or check up messages or trying to organise events on group chats or even just asking when i am free to hang out. and it happens all at once, from all different people. my time feels obligated to someone else because i have to make time to reply or find time to see that person. i leave people on delivered for days because i don’t have the stamina to engage in conversation that was basically demanded out of me during my day. i love my friends, but text messaging has allowed people to infiltrate your personal time at any point of the day, removing time away from yourself and worrying about when to reply or what to say back. it’s a lot, and im overwhelmed by it. sometimes, it makes me just want to fall off the grid.

@jilly

Jan 27, 2025

3

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Responding to messages instantly

As someone who has been a historically negligent telecommunicator, this habit is definitely one that has required some intention and tlc in developing, but boy has it been worth it! First and foremost, this is a bandwidth godsend. By responding to messages as soon as you get them, you fulfill your immediate duty and free up that sweet sweet real estate. But of course there are also many downstream benefits that I will cover in as soon as I qualify a bit and explain the practice. Qualifiers: Obviously dont stay glued to your device, or stop whatever you’re doing, or get into more involved discussion when it is not the time or place to do so. And also in dating I think there is a real value in the air that used to be so natural and implicit before texting. The Practice: Very simple. When an inbound comes in and you see it, simply take 5 seconds to 1 minute to read and respond to it. Most things I find can be answered with a yes, no, or maybe so. And if it can’t, a “can I call you later” or “good question 🤔” or “let me see” might do the trick. And finally, if none of these work go ahead and take your little time and respond later. Downstream benefits: People like it Things get sorted out faster Less falls through the cracks No apology texts or excuses less overthinking communications/more authenticity Obviously there is no right or wrong way. I have a friend that goes read receipts, reads stuff, then, if needed, takes his time to get back to you. And I actually find that nice to be on the receiving end of because it’s always intentional. But I’ve really enjoyed this way and practice and wanted to recommend it as it has added a lot of value in my life.

@nick3

Aug 14, 2024

Top Recs from @taterhole

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Never changing

My dad teases me about how when I was a little kid, my favorite thing to do when I was on the landline phone with somebody—be it a relative or one of my best friends—was to breathlessly describe the things that were in my bedroom so that they could have a mental picture of everything I loved and chose to surround myself with, and where I sat at that moment in time. Perfectly Imperfect reminds me of that so thanks for always listening and for sharing with me too 💌

@taterhole

Feb 23, 2025

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🕊

Finally Quitting the job that you hate

Schedule sent my resignation email for the morning, effective immediately ✅💅

@taterhole

Feb 27, 2025

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Rejecting the Commodification of the Self

I’ve been thinking about how much of social media is centered around curating our self-image. When selfies first became popular, they were dismissed as vain and vapid—a critique often rooted in misogyny—but now, the way we craft our online selves feels more like creating monuments. We try to signal our individuality, hoping to be seen and understood, but ironically, I think this widens the gap between how others perceive us and who we really are. Instead of fostering connection, it can invite projection and misinterpretation—preconceived notions, prefab labels, and stereotypes. Worse, individuality has become branded and commodified, reducing our identities to products for others to consume. On most platforms, validation often comes from how well you can curate and present your image—selfies, aesthetic branding, and lifestyle content tend to dominate. High engagement is tied to visibility, not necessarily depth or substance. But I think spaces like PI.FYI show that there’s another way: where connection is built on shared ideas, tastes, and interests rather than surface-level content. It’s refreshing to be part of a community that values thoughts over optics. By sharing so few images of myself, I’ve found that it gives others room to focus on my ideas and voice. When I do share an image, it feels intentional—something that contributes to the story I want to tell rather than defining it. Sharing less allows me to express who I am beyond appearance. For women, especially, sharing less can be a radical act in a world where the default is to objectify ourselves. It resists the pressure to center appearance, focusing instead on what truly matters: our thoughts, voices, and authenticity. I’ve posted a handful of pictures of myself in 2,500 posts because I care more about showing who I am than how I look. In trying to be seen, are we making it harder for others to truly know us? It’s a question worth considering.

@taterhole

Dec 27, 2024

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