a year ago, a girl i was going out with recommended this album to me, after i heard the song "Insecure" while we made out in her car. a year later, we don't really talk anymore, but i finally listened to this album all the way through... and i loved it so much that i felt compelled to text her and thank her profusely for the recommendation. i kept my text to her short and sweet, but i have a lot to say about this special album.
i'm jewish, and though i'm not a religious person, i've been thinking a lot about religion lately and what it means to me. growing up, i went to synagogue with my family for the high holidays, and i didn't particularly connect with any of the scripture in this sterile environment. throughout college, i was involved in an alternative jewish space that welcomed everyone as they were and centered social justice, and we hosted events where we got to share food, space, songs, hopes for the future, etc.
now that i'm not in college, and not living with my family, i'm figuring out what religion means to me at an individual level and how it affects the way i interact with the world around me. it's been years since i've been to a synagogue, but i try to go to concerts as much as i can, because music means the world to me and experiencing it in a live setting, in community, is sacred... and by sacred, i mean that it commands your full attention, it swallows you whole, forces you to let go.
i haven't experienced this album in a live setting, and because northern picture library have since disbanded, i likely never will. but the other day, after smoking some weed, lighting some candles, laying on the floor in almost complete darkness, and playing this album on my noise-cancelling headphones, i saw god in my room.
every sound on every song envelops you completely. the vocals, the harmonies, the organ, the field recordings, the synths, the guitars, the lyrics... everything is perfection in its purest form. the mix makes it sound so close to you, yet so far away. the overexposed album cover feels incredibly fitting, with every song making up a sliver of a bright and beautifully blinding heaven. and it doesn't surprise me at all that the length of this album is an angel number (1 hr 11 mins).
i can't remember the last time i was this moved by an album. it solidified my desire to, one day, go to divinity school and do extensive research on the many religious qualities of music; i still have loans to pay, life to live, and lots of music to listen to, but i'm excited to go down this rabbit hole one day. it's kind of funny that i've come to this conclusion honestly, considering that the girl who recommended this to me is majoring in religion, and i never thought i would want to study religion at an academic level. i guess this is just a testament to how everyone you meet, and especially everyone you care about (or have cared about), are woven into the fabric of your life, no matter how long they're a part of it. what goes around comes back around... life is a spiral!
i hope you take the time to listen to this album and let it move you. i can't promise you'll see god (we're still getting to know each other), but i guarantee it'll restore your faith... if not in god, then in yourself <3