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Iāve been thinking about this a lot regarding my plan to purge/organize my home, because the way I used to do projects like this just doesnāt work anymore. I can no longer wait until I have the energy, then do as much as I can in one go. I do not have the gift of uninterrupted time anymore. Instead, Iāve had to adjust to a more slow and steady way of working. I choose *one* space to work on each day. Often times it ends up being one drawer, or corner, or step in the process.
Logically this is great and the best way to meet my goals. Mentally/emotionally I kid of hate it because itās not how Iāve worked for my entire life. I have big ideas and want to do them right now!!!! But, when is growth or change ever without a bit of uncomfortability or pain?
So, I am actively changing my mindset. I speak positively to myself about the one small thing I did that day. I share that one small thing with my husband and friends. Because in actuality if it was so easy for me to do, I wouldāve done it before. So my effort deserves some recognition!! Positive reinforcement, even when itās to our own selves, can carry us a long way š«¶
Jan 13, 2025
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Honestly so true! And I think that can even apply to things like work, academics and just life in general. As time passes, our routine changes and what once made sense to be our main goal may now have shifted, so it's important to always keep an open mind
i think it's hard to implement the positive reinforcement when that comes at the cost of convenience! and with a goal like decluttering, convenience is arugably the goalā so, kudos for powering through the dissatisfaction & embracing what allows you to actually STICK with the process that works for you.
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To be upfront, there are two things about myself that I love:
1. I'm tenacious AF
2. I am generally a positive person. I can handle almost any situtation, and I've had to learn to actually ask/demand more, so it's not always great.
With that being said, I've wanted to die many times. I've experienced a lot of trauma. I have PTSD for years. Things got to a point where I knew if I didn't make really drastic changes I was going to die in some way- I simply could not go on how I was.
The only thing that started to change things is when I started to learn more about myself and my reasons for doing things, being with certain people, getting into certain relationships. Part of my whole issue was that I had major trauma from childhood that I was actively avoiding. So many things happen to us as children, big and small, that we don't have the capacticy to deal with at the time. But as adults, we do.
I remember the moment where things started shifting for me. It unlocked a hunger in me to dig more and more to why I was the way I was, and why I made the choices I did, in a really deep way. I became more action oriented in facing my shit, healing it, and discovering what I was like without it. It definitely wasn't easy, and it wasn't fun most of the time, but in reality the years I spent doing that are small compared to the life I have ahead of me. I'm a whole new person, but the parts of me that are true are the same. I became a more mature, loving, responsible version of myself.
Hating your life is a sign something is not working. If you're unsure what that is, go inward. If you don't know where to start, think about the very next step. That's all you need to do. You're never locked in where you're at now forever. Don't know what you want to do for a career? Switch gears and do a completely different job. There is no timeline. You can literally do whatever you want. When I was doing a lot of the stressful inner work, I worked at animal shelters because I needed something so low stress. And I was mid 20's!!! No career goals in sight!!! Not even anywhere in my brain!!! If you're straight up hating something that is taking up most of your time... just quit it. Life is too short.
Success to me is ease and grace. I want a peaceful, joyful life (most of the time). Sometimes to figure out what you need to do, you gotta take a giant step back. Or a step to the left. Or take a big roundabout. Or maybe a quest needs to be taken...
Dec 4, 2024
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Iām tired of jumping through hoops and reframing my mounting dread everyday as āan opportunity to make a changeā. Iām tired of thinking that only if I tried harder, or was better or did something different that I would have a better outcome. At what point do you stop trying to jam the same puzzle piece in the same spot and say,
āHmm maybe this doesnāt fit!ā
Am I quitting trying to be an ever optimizing and improving version of myself? Maybe. OR have I successfully gotten what I wanted out of this experience and can peacefully move on without remorse?
I think in 2025 Iām going to start choosing the latter.
Dec 18, 2024
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Thereās a term I learned that I have found very useful- insight junkies. It is when a person in therapy seeks more and more insight, but never actually heals or transforms any of it. This can be kind of an issue is straight talk therapy- okay weāve identified the issue, now what?
When you clean out a wound, you need to stop messing with it in order for it to heal. It needs to have some air to breathe. Thatās never going to happen if you keep picking at it.
Try things on. Get playful. Make mistakes. TAKE ACTION! Change is not supposed to be easy or comfortable, but that doesnāt mean it canāt also be fun and exciting.
Feb 14, 2025
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This has become the norm and every day I grow more disturbed. I understand if somebody is behaving in a harmful way, that is good to document and put out there. But as a whole, it seems, we have become so comfortable with recording people just living their lives. I saw a video of a guy working and the caption of the video was that he was so hot, we needed to find him!!! Why are you providing the Internet with his face and location instead of just going up to talk to him? I saw another of two people on the subway, seemingly a couple, having a very emotional moment. How would you feel if you open up an app and saw a video like that of yourself? I donāt like this level of sibling society surveillance. Why are you videoing an elderly person with sad music dubbed over it to gain likes? It is WEIRD. Donāt even get me started on videos of children. It is WEIRD to use a stranger without their consent to get some kind of fake validation. Get a life.
I donāt mean to come on here and share something so negative, I just donāt have anywhere else to put it and itās gnawing at me.
Oct 7, 2024
Feb 23, 2025
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Itās to keep us humble otherwise weād be TOO hot/sexy/cool
Jul 3, 2024