1. Meeting my now husband, who self-identified as communist. The first one that I knew in said bubble. 2. 2016 when trump won and I realized how different other people felt to me, causing me to start wanting to fundraise and advocate, but also feeling a great divide between me and people in my life. 3. The ongoing COVID debacle and the response from the US government, continuing today where there has been so much misinformation and lack of regard for people. 4. Having children and realizing just how alone we are in the US. I had no idea how nonexistent any safety net was in our society until I had them. 5. Trump winning again and realizing that fearing others and making lines in the sand with them has partially caused this mess. I am now folding in resources and help for people who are not politically aligned with me. I am working to build community with the people so that they eventually realize that we’re actually against the powerful instead of each other. I am done with infighting.
Jan 26, 2025

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For those who are shocked and in disbelief at how Harris could have lost to Trump, let me try to explain why I think that people were right to want something better than Harris and how Trump took advantage of this rational instinct to serve his own megalomaniacal needs. In short, it’s just 2016 all over again. Everyone knows and agrees that the status quo is failing (or they just benefit from the status quo, but I don’t want to focus on the privileged class since there’s no surprise why they might support Trump). There are also those who do not consciously know that the system is failing, but they might have an unconscious sense of the things which are wrong without a picture of the whole. They might recognize the issues of the cost of living and inflation crisis, the wage crisis, the housing crisis, the climate crisis, the incarceration crisis, the wars and genocides happening with the direct support of the American government and our taxpayer dollars, etc. What they do not see is that these things are the consequences of the same system: Neoliberalism, the American status quo ideology. Our two party system is not the solution to the status quo, it is a product of it, and the system by nature will not produce the solution to itself. Nevertheless, people are like “let's vote for the guy who says he'll make things better over the person who promises more of the same,” and then it just makes everything worse. Just as Clinton lost to Trump in 2016, history will show time and time again that the American public will reject a warmongering, status quo, Neoliberal Democrat in favor of a fascist with rizz that positions himself as being meaningfully different. This is because status quo Democrats believe in the system, they do not want it to change. They largely choose to be blind to its flaws while those to the right of them politically understand the system and its flaws but love it because it serves their individual interests. Trump himself is a member of the wealthy elite and benefits greatly from the status quo, and its his own elite class whom he truly serves. But Trump doesn’t openly present this way, and for good reason. Instead, he presents himself as the people's candidate of change, and he won because of it. This works because the populous knows that their material conditions will not improve under corporatism, American interventionism, capitalism, and individualism, though many would not knowingly identify these as being the greatest forces against their well-being. But, given that this is the status quo ideology of America (Neoliberalism), when an alternative ideology that is objectively worse (Trumpism, which is Fascism) effectively markets itself as being in opposition to the norm and claims that it has the public's best interest at heart (populism), the masses will gravitate towards it even though it will only accelerate the deterioration of their material well-being, as Fascism and Neoliberalism serve many of the same purposes in terms of material impact. In truth, neither ideology benefits from meeting the needs of the people. It may be hard to accept this. The Neoliberal system we were raised in instilled within us the belief that it is a system which works to serve us. Out of the system's need to develop widespread acceptance in order to guarantee self-preservation, we were not raised to see the need for an alternative. In fact, we were taught that other ideologies are inherently worse, which is why we don't use them (some correctly so, none of us were taught that Fascism is good). But when people begin to realize that the system is failing, they reach for whatever alternative seems the most viable without giving much thought as to what that ideology really is. They just know that what we're doing isn't working, and want they to believe in something else. Currently, this is Fascism, and the blind faith in the exceptional and infallible nature of the American status quo which the system instilled in us made it inconceivable to imagine that it would produce Fascism so easily. In addition to an unwillingness to reckon with the truth that America has been seduced by Fascism in the form of Trumpism, the masses have actually been convinced that it is Trumpism which will be their savior by manipulation and propaganda. Online and traditional media spaces have deteriorated meaning and truth to an alarming degree (which may not be irreparable now, but will certainly become irreparable as AI improves in its ability to produce false realities in the form of fabricated digital media—videos, images, articles, etc.—that cannot be distinguished from true real world media, which is to say nothing of the exacerbation of climate catastrophe that AI and capitalism at large will continue to accelerate and that the status quo will continue to be the engine of). It’s unsurprising that the demographic of young men skewed so heavily in favor of Trump, these kids are getting their worldviews from right wing influencers online who care less about truth than preying on the insecurities and fears of their demographic. Same goes for older generations who stick to Fox News and other TV news stations. The process of the erosion of truth in the media spaces from which we now inform so much of our worldviews will only serve those who profit from pitting the victimized masses against themselves. The reality is that neither ideology will improve people's lives meaningfully. If this were true of Neoliberalism, it would have born its fruits by now as it has been the operative ideology of America (and the West at large) at least since the end of WW2, and arguably since the industrial revolution, or indeed even since American independence. And we've seen what fascism does. The only true method to combat the forces of Neoliberalism and Fascism from continuing to impoverish the masses is to return power and agency to those from whom it has been stripped. However, so many Americans have been programmed to demonize any such ideologies and call them Communism, Socialism, etc. They say that these ideologies are inherently anti-American. Which, to be fair, they are inherently in opposition to the status quo, thus they are the solution, but I would not conflate that with being "anti-American" as they are more concerned with the material well-being of the American people than the current system has ever been, and it is the people who are important, not the concept of the American nation state and its position on the world stage (American Hegemony and Imperialism), which is what both Neoliberalism and Fascism serve. What is needed now is a widespread collectivization of the masses in an effort to meet each other's needs in community without reliance on the state or the free market. The people must come together to meet their own needs and demand unceasingly any compromise the system will begrudgingly allow. The mission from here on out is to make it known to the system that we will no longer accept its self-serving agenda to our continued detriment. Even had Harris won, this would only have provided peace of mind for many while the daily material conditions of the people continue to deteriorate. Trump winning makes our system no less at fault, but it may awaken people to the need for a better system. Let this moment radicalize you rather than lead you to despair. The system isn’t broken, it is working exactly as designed, and it must be dismantled. Let's care for each other, y'all.
Nov 6, 2024
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i was raised by two radically left parents who worked in the labor movement, & have adopted a lot of their sociopolitical views in adulthood. i never remember them teaching me anything about politics as a kid, though. of course they discussed their jobs at dinner & occasionally expressed their feelings about elections in front of me, but they never sat me down & told me how the world was, why they feel the way they feel, or why i should feel the same as them. i do remember them teaching me empathy. i remember them teaching me to think about how i might make someone feel before i said anything. i remember them teaching me to invite the kids who normally ate alone to come sit with me & my friends at lunch. i remember them teaching me that hurting somebody else is never going to help me. from this basic education in human compassion, i came to believe that nobody should ever have to go hungry. i came to believe that nobody should ever have to sleep without a roof over their head. & when i learned that the ruling class was forcing masses of people to do those things, boom, there was radicalization.
Jan 25, 2025
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- seconding the recommendation to grieve! ❀‍đŸ©č i think it in someways can be worsened being in a society that is largely undergoing mass denial around things like rising authoritarianism, that the pandemic is still happening, militarized police, economic/social inequality, etc
 so i think taking a moment to feel and acknowledge the validity of your feelings is valuable because society at large is just avoiding acknowledging any of this stuff, partly bc the government doesn’t want us to my other recommendations are: - don’t doomscroll! ❌ idk if i think tuning out completely can be entirely helpful because it might reverse psychology into worrying about what news you’re missing out on. so i recommend being more mindful of when/where you‘re viewing news. for example, i try not to scroll twitter past 9/10 at night and set my phone settings to not let me lol. so before bed and when i first wake up i’m not immediately looking at the news! i recommend this - readddd! 📖 i saw some other ppl recommend it and honestly it has helped me a lot. maybe look into things like speculative fiction too, but a book i will recommend is let this radicalize you by kelly hayes and mariame kaba. the book is intended for new organizers but i think it can apply to anyone just curious about organizing or people who organize. personally i have been more serious about organizing for a year and a half, and reading the book this year really helped me feel less hopeless. the idea that we keep us safe (which sucks but also empowers us to think outside of govt structures that fail us) and that we always have the freedom of our imagination to envision a new world
 ✹ the book is really good. i also recommend adrienne maree brown’s work, specifically her book emergent strategy and also her podcast and instagram. she’s really great.
Jun 29, 2024

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I had seen people casually before my current partner of almost 12 years, but never love. I realized I could spend near infinite amount of time with him. That I didn’t mind holding his hand in public Or snuggling with him in front of my family Or introducing him to my friends Or calling him babe or love. The idea of vacationing to him only sounded fun. The idea of moving in together felt right and he felt the same way. We revel/ed in love celebrations. All of this happened for me within the first year and I was completely thrown off because I was always stressed out about the potential of being seen (both at all but especially as a spectacle that a relationship brings) and then with him I didn’t mind at all.
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