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I completely understand where everything on the list of cons is coming from but none of it is entirely true. New York is $$$ and yet millions of people find away to make it sort of work. (consider community resources, free events, no spend days.) New York is loud and yet there are quiet parks, and nearly silent neighborhoods (like my old haunt in Bay Ridge where I almost went crazy from the silence and listening to the waves every day.) New York is smelly & yet, there’s fresh air by the sea, over the rivers, on secluded streets (& many more good smells like bakeries, and laundry, the sea–again!–, and dusty stores, and the bleach smell of nearly cleaned sidewalks) & you don’t have to be young to live here. Most people aren’t. (The old people are the best.) No matter where you go, if you only look for the negative you will find it. But in a city this big you will find the exceptions are the norm.

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here’s my misc thoughts lol i’m no expert but this is from my POV as someone who’s lived here full time a bit and grew up visiting all the time. firstly, you’re def right that it is expensive — nearly impossible to relocate to if you don’t have a job secured and aren’t rich. even moreso if you have never visited or have only done one super tourist-y visit--it’s not just Times Square and Statue of Liberty (love her tho) rainbows and butterflies vibes lol. like i seriously do not recommend moving here if you haven’t been to other boroughs, and neighborhoods outside of Midtown, SoHo, FiDi, UES etc. i’ve never been to england so can’t speak to it bit you might find it helpful to look online for comparisons to cities you’ve spent more time in - london and other cities in europe perhaps. consider if NYC would be that much more exciting or ā€œbetterā€ for you? also there’s a huge issue of influencers and people who wanna live here impulsively for fun that has driven up rent and driven out lifetime residents, esp working class folks and people of color. (lots of writing out there on the difference between moving to any city vs gentrifying one, and what one can do to not be complicit in the latter). and, my family is from here and i have always loved the city; i did get a job here after graduation but i really wouldn’t have moved here if i hadn’t. so definitely come here intentionally, and arrive with a willingness to engage with your community! sometimes new residents who aren’t as acquainted with the ā€œrealā€ new york and can’t afford apts in the more gentrified or historically wealthy areas (most of manhattan, some parts of brooklyn) have a misconception of the city, so they end up feeling awkward or ā€œunsafeā€ where they live, and thus don’t give back to their neighborhood. it’s veryyy weird that some people move here only to go to work, eat out and party on the weekends. (not saying this is you ofc! but just a general note). the irony is that NYers get a bad rep for the mind your own business culture and realness--and yeah NYers aren’t ā€œniceā€, but people are kind. folks care about and actively help out their neighbors. i saw this in my own fam growing up! and as sinatra himself once said: ā€œif i can make it here, i’ll make it anywhere.ā€ it is a tough place to ā€œmake itā€ for people without roots. but i’d never deny that new york, for many of us, lives up to its reputation as the so-called greatest city in the world ;)
Aug 30, 2024
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I am from this city and I can tell you it is terrible! and yet: •You can see some of the best art in the world, and really enmesh yourself in a cultural scene, if that is your jam •You can get most things that there are to get (but they are expensive) •You can live with your friends in an apartment that is falling apart for not a crazy amount of money, if you hunt for the right place •The pizza here is better than everywhere else in the world and I am not kidding I used to cry thinking about it when I lived in Maryland for a while •Yes it is dirty and smelly but ? so are we all •For all its woes, New York does have a really good sense of community if you can be open to it •Pigeons are nice
Feb 4, 2025
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West Village = Bad (I don’t even know what’s going on over there, I just know it’s bad)
A single beverage at coffee shop is $10-15
New Yorkers love ugly shoes
Rent is insanely highĀ 
The coolness of a New Yorker is determined by how niche and obscure their interests are
Everyone has a bicycle
Is this accurate?

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No screen Sundays. If I want to listen to music its CDs or radio. If I want to watch a movie, no I don’t. If I want to see a friend, I will make plans with them on Friday or Saturday to meet up. As a result, I read more, write more, and sit with questions like ā€œdid Citizen Kaneā€˜s 50 year winning streak in the Sight and Sound critics choice survey end in 2012 or 2022? When did Stephen Merritt come out? Whats the etymology of Whitsun?ā€œ
This is something that I have practiced off and on for many years but I’ve been doing it every week since December and I love the way that it just allows me one day of true freedom and rest.
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My calendar this year has 52 of these week at a glance pages but I don’t think that way. So, I've been inspired by Ross Gay’s Book of Delighs to start recording the little moments and sensations that bring me joy throughout the day. An analog pi.fyi, if you will.
heres some of what I have so far:
- Waking up to the sound of my upstairs neighborā€˜s footstep. It sounded nostalgic. Felt like company.
- Strawberry jam
- feeling tender for strangers: their lips, nail colors, their small wrists. Thinking of all the lives we hold gently.
- A young girl bought an LP at the bookstore just before I left. She stroked its cover with love
- Green tiles —the mint shade always makes me think of Jancie
- Charlie’s little bop and punch dancing to some German language punk - lunch with Katherine, curry Brussels sprouts
- small talk at the photo studio. The photographer's brother was named after their dad, stole his identity, bought jet skis.