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I’ve spent years coming to terms with my relationship to shopping and how that impacts my life, my finances, my relationship to self. I’ve done no-spend months and saved up for items, but by far my favorite tactic to curbing my spending is delayed gratification. Anytime I see something I want, I add it to my digital wishlist. The beauty is, the act of putting the item on the list keeps the idea of it alive and satisfies this tiny urge to spend money. Even better, the list acts as a little magic tool of manifestation. I have periodically been gifted things off of my list and regularly find items on the list second hand!
Feb 27, 2025
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lol I was reading this and was like wow finally a good one and wow what a good list….and of course it’s you
normal_woman your Marimekko bedding is the reason for the season. Next set I get is gonna be from Marimekko!
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I'm still trying to practice what I preach here. Capitalism makes it pretty hard; they want to keep us buying things so instant pleasure and gratification is marketed and thrown at us everywhere, and makes us feel like to be accepted in society, we must always have the latest "thing." But I've started to realize nothing deeply good can come easy, or cheap for that matter. It feels way more satisfying to know I've purchased something of quality, something that means something to me, something that'll last, rather than a cheap fad that'll have to be replaced soon anyway. Not to mention knowing and caring WHERE your money is going (small businesses over large corporations, looking into what the company stands for.) There are so many times I've told myself I can't afford something I really want and am drawn to, when I've realized how much I've spent on stupid little cheap things that don't matter to me. For yourself, for others, for the planet, spend INTENTIONALLY. And if that means you end up owning less, good! And while you're at it, do a bit of Marie Condo-ing (but please, donate what you can for christ's sake.) You might experience a little withdraw with the lack of stuff and lack of spending, but I think overall you'll feel lighter, freer and more satisfied!
Jun 19, 2024
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i always ask myself before frivolous/spontaneous/treat purchases whether i would choose the item itself or the money in cash if someone walked up to me and offered me both.
this is really helpful to me, and i try to make saving money a competition with myself trying to achieve lots of little goals instead of just thinking "i'm not spending any money ever again" and feeling guilty when i do. because its actually okay to spend some :) you deserve a treat every now and then :)
Dec 1, 2024
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if you have a chronic online shopping addiction, i’ve learned to just look at the item, obsessively, regularly, like once every two hours … repeat that for a week until you’re strong enough to not buy it. sometimes just looking at the pictures satisfies a bit of the urge…
the key is to remind yourself that the desire will pass. everything is temporary, and if it’s an unnecessary buy, the excitement will wear off eventually
Jan 31, 2024
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i canceled my Spotify account over the summer and have spent the last few months rebuilding my digital music library on a refurbished iPod Touch. reading critiques of the app (and it’s enshittification), i realized i wasn’t even sure of my own musical tastes and preferences. i had stopped picking for myself, stopped seeking out new music, ceasing to know how to choose what i wanted or articulate what i like.
breaking free from the algorithm has been such a joy! i’m borrowing gobs of music from the library, rebuilding my old playlists, and consuming more music than i have in years. and better yet, my data isn’t being tracked by Spotify and i own what’s in my personal library. further, my receptors are more open when i’m out in the world exposed to music, searching for recommendations in an organic way.
Jan 16, 2025
i’ve been trying to articulate why i enjoy this space so much. yes, the UX is reminiscent of Tumblr and the early days of the internet. and there’s genuine sincerity and vulnerability on here that makes it feel really cozy and real, which i haven’t felt online in at least a decade.
but i think what’s undergirding my love of this space is how anti-capitalist it feels. most of the recs everyone shares are vibe-checks, quality of life shifts, meditations and offers, music and movies, just plain good art. i don’t feel compelled to buy anything when i come here. i feel excited and pumped to be a cheerleader, find connection, find common ground. and FWIW the recs i’ve shared that have gotten the most traction are my suggestions for leading a less capitalistic / consumerist life (quitting Amazon, getting off of Spotify, building community to take care of you and your things).
all of this is to say, i love it here and i love you guys.
Feb 7, 2025
hear me out—this one might feel impossible, but i quit purchasing items on Amazon in 2018 and cancelled my GoodReads account shortly after.
i did some serious reflection and realized i’d become super reliant upon, and frankly, quite used to the instant gratification of purchasing something and knowing i’d have it within a day. that’s not normal. the labor practices, economics, and environmental impacts of getting what you want from the internet delivered quickly and right to your door are skewed. i was filling a void in myself with mindless purchases.
i’m aware that they service a huge swath of the internet (Amazon Web Services), own Whole Foods and Abe Books, and will likely take over more businesses we like and rely on. weaning off and avoiding entirely is very very hard, but it can also be a measured decision. that said, i know that it is a privilege to abstain from Amazon. i am able bodied, i don’t have kids, i have access to a car, i live in an urban environment with access to a lot of stuff at my fingertips. but making the choice to break out of the Amazon loop has ultimately been better for my pocketbook and better for my relationship to these mega-tech-companies that have their fingers in everything.
in contrast, i’m becoming more interested in alternate economies, like bartering and sharing. i love the idea of having commonly shared tools and items (tool libraries are very cool). we don’t need to own it all, we have each other.
interested in exploring more? the zine pictured below is a great start, and summarizes a much larger book by the same author on how to resist the leviathan that is Amazon.
Jan 22, 2025