This is annoying advice but love has always come to me when I’m not looking for it. When I get very active in things I’m passionate about (usually leftie organizing but also art and history stuff and also just spending time with friends a la the friends of friends rec) I meet new people and find interesting, aligned folks.
Apr 5, 2024
Related Recs
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Truly, it will come out of nowhere. In my case from a place where I’d least expected it.
-don’t seek out a specific kind of love, sometimes having close friends you can emotionally connect w and support is so so important for your wellbeing. And more often than not romantic love can sprout from the platonic sort.
-keep growing and healing and being the best version of yourself u can be being yourself is so insanely magnetic esp. to those who are going to mesh well w u
-be receptive to your own emotions and Know that love will come out of nowhere and hit u upside the head
Jun 7, 2024
now i am a very lucky person because i am in love with some who was once one of my best friends. (sadly this rec probably isn’t universally applicable but contains good lessons i hope!) i’d met him during the first week of freshman year of college, and we immediately became close. hung out a ton and related on a lot of issues/values but our interactions were always platonic.
by wintertime we were being seen together around campus a ton, to the point that our acquaintances started asking whether we were a couple. we’d laugh at the idea, even joking about it ourselves. oh how oblivious we were.
spring rolled around and i suddenly caught feelings. for a couple weeks i tried to convince myself i didn’t like him because i was so afraid of losing our beautiful friendship. i thought it impossible that he would feel the same as me. yes, pretty torturous!! alas, my Emotional Suppression didn’t work. thank god, because one night when we were hanging out in my room he finally kissed me. i had been so afraid but instantly i knew it was right. the risk was worth it.
we’ve now been together for almost two years and he is truly the love of my life. he is the best risk I’ve ever taken. yes this is so platitudinous, but sometimes love comes when you least expect it and appears in odd places!
more generally, i think
- looking for people whose values align with yours is a wonderful place to start establishing intimate and long-lasting relationships, both platonic and romantic.
- it’s never worthwhile to force something to work out if your gut tells you it’s wrong — you’re worth more than that. love doesn’t thrive when it’s fed by obligation and pressure.
- don’t be afraid to present yourself in your full authenticity to others. if someone else has a problem with You in your Grandest Expression, they’re not worth your energy. love is meant to affirm and expand who you are, not place boundaries on it.
- go on self dates and explore what it means to have a loving relationship with yourself! you, as a singular self, are already whole and enough without having a partner. you are complete as a baseline regardless of your relationship status; a partner is meant to complement and embrace this wholeness!!
love is ridiculous and hard and beautiful; trust it when you feel it!!
Nov 10, 2024
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Been single for a while now after a 7 year relationship ended really poorly. for a while I caught myself trying to force love out of lust. dating apps, eye contact that lasts an extra second, I started seeing the love of my life everywhere. Taking time with myself, without any sort of pressure, has revealed layers of love (both romantic and not). I can’t recommend this enough. Don’t close yourself off to love, but don’t try to force it when it’s just not there.
Jan 26, 2024
Top Recs from @zetus_lupetus
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Upper East Side. He shouted “I thought it was a Tuesday” on a Wednesday into a flip phone in the early 2000s. He sounded just like he does in the movies 💕
Mar 25, 2024
Harpo is very sweet and loves all people but is very particular about dogs and always wants to be the center of attention. He listens perfectly if treats are involved but otherwise is not very interested in what we want. He was found wandering the streets of Bakersfield (we decided he was too small to be named Buck) and now he is a bougie Silver Lake pup and has his own set of friends and admirers in the neighborhood.
Laemmle was found crying in a hole all alone on a cold and rainy night Just outside of LA’s Chinatown. When she was a baby she was a demon about any food, especially butter, but now she is perfect and sweet and loves to sit in your lap in purr. She kills and eats bugs so we never have to worry about them. (Lem-lee)
Apr 6, 2024
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It’s raining in LA, what else are we supposed to do?
Mar 2, 2024