-do your conflict resolution on the phone or in person, no angry text messages!!!
-don’t let consumerism be your entry point into a new hobby. you don’t need the latest and greatest gear/equipment to have fun
-be funny about your complaints and thank your friends for listening
-dating is completely optional and if you are not enjoying it, you don’t have to do it
-make it easy for people you love to spend time with you without spending money
-doing acts of kindness for others is an anti-depressant for all parties
-eating someone else’s leftovers without permission is sick and twisted behavior
-never cut a good conversation short just because “it’s getting late”
-wedding gifts are optional
May 25, 2024
Related Recs
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I don’t mean this in a let’s enforce toxic positivity way. And maybe this sounds simple and obvious but I’ve learned from my own experience and observations that it can be off-putting to others to always be complaining, criticizing, or saying negative things! It can really bring the energy down whether it’s in interactions with close friends, significant others, family, coworkers, dates, or strangers and it doesn’t make people feel good.
This isn’t to say that you should never have critical thoughts, engage in difficult conversations, or share your heavy emotions with people you trust. but I think this is something people can do without even realizing it’s a pattern for them and it has an effect on your own psyche as well imo… and it feels great to bring a little light into someone’s day 🌦️
Apr 19, 2024
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why be negative when you can be positive. If you see someone do something dumb just ignore it (unless it’s especially funny then you can share it with friends another time).
We only live once so best to focus on the positives. When you’re nice to others you feel much better yourself. And everyone’s constantly learning, making mistakes anyway so while other people may seem uninformed sometimes, you also will be at points and you wouldn’t want to be ridiculed for that.
As for others being negative, just nod along and ignore. Or try to change the topic.
Jan 28, 2025
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1. Don’t talk to me until I’ve had my coffee
2. Be discerning about wants vs. needs
3. At the very least don’t make things difficult for people but ideally be helpful
4. Show grace and understanding to others
5. Hay comida en la casa
May 19, 2024
Top Recs from @trappedinabody
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felt the same way, was sick of it. got a flip phone i could slip my sim card into, activated it. first two weeks i was kind of itching for the smartphone and the little dopamine hits. after a while things started changing. i started reading for fun again, my attention span improved significantly, i carried a little journal everywhere to jot down my thoughts. in every room where everyone was on their phones, i felt like i was the only person actually present, paying attention. i found so many beautiful ways to fill the time. strangers praised me for my bravery lol. when i had to drive or go somewhere i didn’t know how to get to i would write down the directions on a post it note and carry it or stick it to the dashboard. you will literally feel smarter for relying on your brain to figure things like this out instead of being on autopilot all the time. you can carry your smartphone around to use as an ipod/pocket camera and in an emergency it will still work on wifi. i asked friends to look things up for me (business hours, weather, traffic, phone numbers) when i was out and about. if people texted me id tell them to call me if they wanted to talk. it was a great decision that only ended bc i did an extended trip abroad where i needed my phone to get by, but i am going to go back to the flip again soon. i highly recommend! nothing compares to flipping a phone shut to hang up a call. it taught me how to enjoy true solitude again. do it!!!
Feb 27, 2024
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after being raised in a context where you were taught to be hard on yourself, leaning into self-compassion as a way of life in adulthood is truly powerful. hold yourself accountable and give yourself grace when you flounder, both are needed.
Mar 3, 2024
“wow i am in so much pain, i feel so ALIVE”
“i am grateful to know that i have loved, truly loved”
“may i never grow too guarded to feel into the depths of my soul”
“all my favorite artists have felt this feeling, i am bound by heartbreak to my fellow humans”
“this grief is a process of me returning to myself”
if all else fails, watch the clip from call me by your name where the dad talks to his son about heartbreak (linked)
keep a journal, be patient, show yourself as much compassion as you possibly can
Mar 16, 2024