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This one changed me, blending well with my Absurdist and Buddhist beliefs.
The thesis of Becker’s book is that human civilization is rooted in our internal defenses against the inevitability of death. We struggle to accept our impermanence and thus devise ”immortality projects” that we hope outlive us. If we must die, we hope to be remembered via some kind of legacy that will live on symbolically. These projects could be grounded in one’s work, family, or religion.
We seek symbolic illusions that assuage our death anxiety, or we drown ourselves with triviality and hedonism. Either way, our survival instinct makes it difficult for us to face the certainty of death and the uncertainty of life.
While the topic is heavy, shining a light on the terror of death, it also helps me feel lighter. It reminds of how many of the things that feel so urgent in life are really just distractions. Everything we do is beautifully temporary. Life is building sandcastles on the beach. And while it can be beautiful and meaningful for us to create and collaborate, there is a lightness to the understanding that everything we ever do or make will one day be nullified by our ultimate annihilation.
So, in other words, don’t take yourself too seriously.
Dec 9, 2024
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Yes I realize this is far more than one book, but I read all of these stories in very close succession & I believe they shaped me into the guy I am today. These are all very sensitive-young-man-core, but what can I say? I was a sensitive young man.
I have a very complicated relationship with Mother & Father. When I was first introduced to Kafka, it was like meeting my soulmate. I don’t have it in me to go into much detail at this moment, but being condemned to death by drowning for failing an aging father who can sense a deeply felt resentment; waking up one day to find you’ve turned into a disgusting bug after sacrificing so much for a family that cares so little— these are ideas that deeply rattled & resonated with me personally at the age that I read them. I resolved to try to live differently.
Death of Ivan Ilych was simply further exhortation for me to not live my life according to convention, to pursue wealth, status, family life for their own sakes. I think every single one of us has it in us to become an Ivan Ilych without even realizing. I was totally rapt & manic upon finishing this one I still am today, to some degree.
Portrait of the Artist really spoke to me as well. When Stephen looks at his father & realizes he’s a fool, and that he wants to be nothing like him. The moment when he sees the girl in the water & he becomes so horny he decides to dedicate his life to the pursuit of beauty, to aesthetics, to being an artist. The entire ending segment written as first person journal entries filled me with a lot of hope.
Emerson is the man. Great way to shock the materialist reductionist, the comformist, the busybody, & the consistent, conventional company man out of your system. Probably made me a more annoying person when alls said & done. Oh well.
May 12, 2024
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Cute & pithy subversion of ”wherever you go, there you are”, the mantra that basically ruled my life for three years. Gave me recognition of agency that I sorely needed when surrendering myself to my circumstances and making peace with everything just wasn’t cutting it.
Happens to be the title of a short essay from All Things Are Too Small by Becca Rothfeld, an essay collection that turned me upside down, held me by the ankle, and shook me until a whole bunch of unquestioned Goods fell right out of my worldview, including (the subject of this essay!!) western meditation and the self control in pursuit of indifference that is its ultimate stated aim.
This essay in particular I think goes on for a little too long but hey!! Excess and indulgence in all things sex and love and thought and beauty and worldly items - each are handled completely separately and thoughtfully and wittily and I can’t blame her for making the words and passages themselves as lush and voluminous as their subjects reportedly ought to be. If you read it (I hope you do!!!) it’ll change the way and depth in which you think about Something and it won’t even be the thing you expect
Aug 8, 2024
You may be familiar with his first book "Be Here Now" considered a seminal work of the hippie/eastern spiritualism movement in the US. Personally, that book doesn't do much for me.
This follow up however, is sublime. Ram Dass made a career out of communicating and teaching and this book depicts his life post-stroke which left him unable to speak. As this was quite a stark transition from his previous path and abilities the book is a great insight into the way aging/illness changes us. It's about life and change and death and I can't recommend it enough.
Jan 16, 2025
Top Recs from @zenlikeme
“We live in a world in which we need to share responsibility. It’s easy to say ‘It’s not my child, not my community, not my world, not my problem.’ Then there are those who see the need and respond. I consider those people my heroes.”
— Fred Rogers
2d ago
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The guy got my attention with, “Hey, I like your shoes.” Just like that, he had me. We talked about where I bought the shoes and how I used to work in the shoe industry. He used to work in the beer industry but had recently become independently wealthy because of an investment opportunity he started with a few of his friends.
”You get to be your own boss,” he told me. Your boot could be on your own neck. We’re back to the topic of shoes.
He told me it’s a small investment to get started but things are really taking off and I could get in on the ground floor. I could quit my job. Work for myself. Had I ever considered doing something like that?
“No,” I said with a shrug. I walked away with my jar of peanut butter. I can’t remember if it was creamy or crunchy. Probably crunchy.
Nice guy!
Feb 25, 2025
I haven’t been on Twitter for years and hardly touch FB, but I had been an active user on Instagram since 2012. I really like taking and sharing photos, and that had always been a fun place to do it.
No more.
With the changes the content moderation changes they’re making, leaving LGBTQ+ folks vulnerable to be targeted; their rolling back of DEI programs; their willing participation in far-right rhetoric and politics; it’s all too much and I’m out.
As if Meta’s platform hadn’t already been increasingly enshittified, this was the final straw to announce how much worse it will get.
And you know what? It feels freeing. Better to leave it behind and find new platforms to connect with people.
Jan 22, 2025