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secure disagreement
been trying to internalize the idea that disagreeing with friends about something deepens your understanding and expands your empathy for different views and experiences outside of your own. Having the trust that you can debate something without it ending the friendship will lead to more interesting conversations and a more substantive relationship. And having these conversations in person so you can see all the nuance and care for each other. It takes work, but I think it's worth it.
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@Shadowbeni
Feb 4, 2025
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Comments (3)

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@Viridian
real asf, if u can't have a friend with different opinions ur lame as hell
Feb 4, 2025
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@theclack
I’m curious what the differences in opinion/beliefs pertain to specifically or which ones you feel like go too far. I’m grappling with some now that kind of feel like make-or-break worldview things
Feb 4, 2025
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@Shadowbeni
theclack anything discriminatory is a hard line for me. that's just a basic value and I'm not going to be friends with people who put people down or above others based on race, gender, orientation or disability. Agreement on a problem existing is a good place to start, and then disagreement on how to solve it is where good discussions happen.
Feb 4, 2025

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using your words to resolve conflicts so things don’t brew for no reason
i wish people were better at this. big sign of emotional maturity i think is when people are actually capable of this. things happen and if you can’t talk them through what are you meant to do? just let it stew so it gets worse? let it destroy a relationship for no reason? fuck all that. have the conversations so you can reach an understanding. we can’t read eachothers minds man
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@shegoestoanotherschool
Jun 10, 2024
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Intellectual conversations that go nowhere
Conversations about odd points of views and things that presently don't matter much in our lives gives us space to use our critical thinking and conversational skills. So even if these conversations don't lead to complete conclusions and spiral out of the realm of what the original points were just having time to go through the motions and speak openly and debate your peers can be super beneficial in my humble opinion. Plus it's fun! Who wouldn't want to talk about the complications of fictional magic in the real world? Or about the pros and cons of candy packaging?
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@juniperberry
Jun 5, 2024
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Giving people space to speak/Think
It bums me out whenever someone's trying to say something but cuts themselves off or says "nevermind" because they assume that they're wasting time. Think it through, or let it come back to you. 3 years ago, I started saying, "Talk through the thought" with my friend, and I think it's made me more patient, and I've ended up hearing/saying some cool shit (or at least some funny shit) that I would've probably missed out on otherwise.
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@burybusy
Feb 23, 2024

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dancing
a study issued last month found that dancing is the most effective way of treating and mitigating depression. Walking, therapy, and yoga also outpaced SSRIs. and if you're saying 'oh this was probably funded by Big Dance', there's no evidence of that and if you're saying 'that's just what a Big Dance shill would say', well honey you're right
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@Shadowbeni
Mar 4, 2024
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when you hear your friends’ work voice
Reminder that most of what we do is a performance
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@Shadowbeni
Feb 24, 2025
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Willem dafoe
He is my moo deng
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@Shadowbeni
Oct 3, 2024