🧍🏼♀️
women watch each other; i watch my girlfriends, and i’m noticing a shift! the waning years of the trump era thrust us—the ones who date men, anyway—into serious relationships. we tweeted about our boyfriends and wore short dresses, espousing an ironic but undeniably effusive allegiance to some kind of nouveau #trad-itionalism. “feminist” became a pejorative and we lost our shit when lana dropped “norman fucking rockwell!” but now? everybody’s breaking up and getting her own apartment! the girls are sleeping around and wearing interesting pants with the tabi boots they bought during the second term of the obama administration. they’re speaking critically of “porn” in hushed tones, or in lower-case letters on twitter. as a friend of mine recently muttered, eyebrow raised: “maybe feminism made some points”
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Historically, I have been too insecure to be a girl. That pressure of prettiness, of being delicate, of being desirable. I refused to engage. But this year something has shifted. I love cardigans, I want to talk about how I do my hair, I learned how to do make-up. Even though I'm not a model, I adore making myself feel pretty and sexy. I'm falling in love with the culture of feminism, and reclaiming mother earth as a mother. Girlhood is something so insanely precious and now, despite it being so hard, I am so unbelievably grateful I get to experience it. Want to merge my soul with every woman on the planet and scream OH HOW I LOVE BEING A WOMAN!
Jan 17, 2025
🪆
in my very unimportant opinion, too many adult women are obsessed with
“girlhood” and embracing a “girly” lifestyle and I can’t for the life of me understand why they aren’t embracing “womanhood.” are adult women simply afraid of what leaving girlhood behind would mean for them? is it the prospect of the added responsibility that comes from being an adult that keeps them attached to their younger years? or is it just the aesthetics of girlhood that keep them in that mindset? yes when we were girls the world was so open, so new, so mysterious. why should that have to change entirely with age? some women may have more lived experiences and aren’t as easily impressed or mystified by things as they were during girlhood, but i think thats all relative to perspective. there are still sensations, mysteries and first times after the age of 25 and even 45 and so on. shouldn’t we experience it through the lens of women who have already passed the trials of girlhood? maybe this is just another millennial problem.
Feb 4, 2025
💁
told to me by a friend from high school who I had just reconnected with while hanging out with some other hometown friends over the holidays. I was kinda taken aback by how specific it was of her to say haha, kind of the long way of saying that i’m just one of the girlies. i’ll take it tho 💅🏻
Jan 3, 2025
Top Recs from @hari-nef
👯
club carry is a new york-based nightlife collective built around queer, femme djs of color. club carry manifests chaotic, intentional, ecstatic, decadent, and consummately safe spaces around their music: the hardest, fastest, loudest, cuntiest techno i’ve ever heard in north america. founded by dj antpuke, with a fluid roster of regulars including ariel zetina, memphy, dangerous rose, and sauscha, club carry stands alone and apart within the bottle service hellscape of new york nightlife. trans girls and boys—or, as antpuke ava calls them, “dolls and ken dolls”—get in free. the girls who go all night, and most of them do, wear wrap-around shield shades in anticipation of the sunrise
Sep 16, 2021
🤡
the fool, also known as the clown, is a touchstone of memes concerning the self-reflexivity of one’s own silliness, or more likely her foolishness. no more: silliness is the highest form of morality. i was watching an episode of rupaul’s drag race: untucked recently—season 2, which corresponds to rupaul’s drag race season 3, because the first season had no untucked—and there was shangela: leering, musing whether or not she’d been set up to be “the fool” in the wake of some foul play involving the construction of a gown made out of hair. there is valor in being deceived, shangela! there is even glamour in looking dumb. if you’re reading this you’re uncool: so why fake it?
Sep 16, 2021
🎋
the pines have a dubious reputation: a strip-of-a-strip of hamptons-adjacent driftwood crawling with rich white gay weekend warriors desperate to party and play among the island’s native pines and its unethically-imported bamboos. this is not untrue! but i spent a month there this summer, and i found myself amused and even inspired by the pines’ inherent theatricality. every single house—for better or for worse—is a stage set for someone’s idea of gay heaven. the itinerary of every chosen fam on their weekend or week-long excursion comprises a script for a queer friend group at its absolute best: “we cook! we swim in the ocean at night! we take ghb and 2cb! we smoke cigarettes and discuss auto-fiction! we fight about auto-fiction!” the pines are possibilities
Sep 16, 2021